Pre-Show
MATT: Hello, everyone, and welcome to tonight's episode of Critical Role, where a bunch of us dirty-- Dirty?
TRAVIS: Dirty?
MATT: A bunch of us dirty-ass voice actors.
ASHLEY: Yes, we are!
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: Keep it! Taylor, keep it.
TRAVIS: Keep it. (laughter)
MATT: And play Dungeons & Dragons. (laughter)
TRAVIS: We play dirty-ass dragons! (laughter)
TALIESIN: More spin the bottle.
MATT: I'm surprised it took this long. Wow. How do you know when your CPU's close to full?
ASHLEY: ♪ Want to get dirty! ♪
MATT: Before we jump into our dirty ass-night of roleplay-- (laughter)
MATT: -- we do have some announcements to get through, beginning with our sponsor for the night, NordVPN with our next installment of the Nordverse: The ReVerse. And now that Sam's back, he wrote this one.
SAM: That's right. When we last left our heroines, CryptonicOverride and GaleForce69, they had rendezvoused with Madam President to take down a super serious threat to the Nordverse. Let's see what their plan is.
LAURA: Madam President, we're going to need to do a Ctrl-Alt-Delete reset of the entire global internet. Think you can give me UN approval?
MARISHA: Already done. Locked and load.
ASHLEY: Okay. Shutting down the GigaNet in five, four, three.
LAURA: Wait, you have an accent.
LIAM: (like a kid) Hey, everybody, it's me, Saily. Simmy, simmy, sail!
LAURA: What? Who?
LIAM: Saily, your favorite eSIM sidekick.
ASHLEY: Wait, what? Sam, what is this?
SAM: Sorry, sorry. NordVPN has this awesome new eSIM product called Saily. It's true. If you've ever been abroad or needed internet connection with no WiFi in sight, you need Saily.
LIAM: An eSIM provides an internet connection wherever you travel and saves you money on roaming fees! And it's brought to you by NordVPN, so you know it's great. Simmy, Simmy, sail.
LAURA: That's cute. But Sam, since you left, we took the Nordverse in a different direction.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah. More badass, more girl boss.
LAURA: Yeah.
ASHLEY: More serious.
MARISHA: Yeah. I'm the president now, so we don't really need sidekicks.
SAM: Well, actually, the focus testing says otherwise. Saily tested great with kids age four to seven, tweens, even sportos, motorheads, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads. They all adore him.
TALIESIN: Wow.
LAURA: How are we supposed to gleam the cube with this goofball around?
SAM: Again, gleaming the cube is out. The new catchphrase is...
LIAM: Simmy, simmy, sail!
ASHLEY: I, no offense, but this guy is a chode. (laughter)
LAURA: Yeah. First class goober.
ASHLEY: Oh. Oh no. Oh man. I'm so sorry, Saily. (laughter)
MARISHA: Yeah. We didn't mean it. How can we make you feel better?
LIAM: I don't know. You could grab the exclusive NordVPN deal at nordvpn.com/criticalrole and get four extra months and up to 20GB of Saily! You try it risk free now with a 30-day money back guarantee! Simmy, Simmy, sail!
SAM and MARISHA: Simmy, Simmy, sail.
SAM: Matt, hack to you.
TRAVIS: Oh boy.
MATT: I hate it.
LAURA: I know, it's the worst.
LIAM: Ah! I need a shower. (laughter)
TALIESIN: How did it feel to go full Scrappy?
ASHLEY: No.
LIAM: Oh. Never go full saiyan.
TALIESIN: Yeah. (laughter)
MATT: That is-- (laughter)
MATT: That is--
TALIESIN: Nice Bueller, too, well done.
ASHLEY: I don't like it.
SAM: Oh yeah, yeah.
MATT: That is the new paralysis demon.
ASHLEY: No.
MATT: Travis, you got an announcement.
TRAVIS: Yes! This weekend we are attending Anime New York! (cheering)
MARISHA: New York City!
TRAVIS: And next weekend on August 31st and September 1st, just Laura and I because fuck you guys. (laughter)
TRAVIS: We'll be in Sacramento up at SAC Anime. You can catch all the details. Did you just knee the table?
LAURA: Don't worry about it.
TRAVIS: All the details are in critrole.com/events. We hope to see you there. (cheering)
MATT: Fantastic. Thank you, Travis. Marisha, you're up.
MARISHA: The finale of Moonward: A Midst Roleplaying Story is now on Beacon! And then for everyone else, this heartwrenching and epic conclusion airs next week on Twitch and midst.co and the Midst YouTube channel. Go give them a little sub-y sub, if you haven't yet, get caught up. It's so good. And as a reminder, you can check out our full programming calendar each week on Monday mornings on critrole.com.
LAURA: Robbie's going to be in Sacramento, too.
ASHLEY: Woo!
MARISHA: Oh yeah, Robbie!
ROBBIE: I won't be in New York so it evens out.
TRAVIS: Oh, okay. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Everybody but Robbie! (laughter)
MATT: There we go. We fixed it. Laura, you're up next.
LAURA: Yes. You guys.
LIAM: Whatcha got?
LAURA: We have.
ASHLEY: ♪ Do do do do do ♪
LAURA: ♪ Do do do do ♪ I love this. This is part of our Vox Machina collection. We made a Percival de Rolo cardigan.
ASHLEY: Cartagan.
LAURA: A cartagan. It's so classy. Wait. Hold on, there's a Whitestone logo. (ooh-ing)
LAURA: It features this-- This is such a classy logo--
TRAVIS: Looks comfy.
LAURA: -- by Aaron Monroy.
TALIESIN: Comfy, yet melancholy.
LAURA: Yeah. If you put it on, you'll find out. It's soft, it's subtle.
ASHLEY: Wear it without anything underneath it.
LAURA: It's cozy and classy.
TALIESIN: You're in the room with the big fireplace, but you're too far away from the fireplace to be hot because you need to be alone.
LAURA: Yeah it's giving, reading a book by a fireplace or fucking on a pile of money.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Ooh!
TALIESIN: Scrooge McDuck.
MARISHA: Walking on a pile of money. Oh, fucking on a pile--
LAURA: But you know, just walking is better.
TALIESIN: The McDuck.
TRAVIS: Bleep that one, too. (laughter)
LAURA: Sorry.
MATT: Do as the Whitestonians do.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: All right. Thank you so much, Laura.
MARISHA: Dirty voice actors.
LAURA: Sorry.
MATT: I believe.
LAURA: It's really great, though.
ASHLEY: ♪ Got to get dirty ♪
TALIESIN: It's super comfy.
LAURA: You can go on.
MATT: That's okay. We're done.
MARISHA: This is unhinged.
MATT: (laughs) Oh. Just now?
TALIESIN: (laughs)
MATT: To be fair, I kicked it off with dirty-ass voice actors, so it's on me. I do believe that concludes our announcements. So let's go ahead and jump into tonight's episode of--
SAM: Simmy simmy sail!
MATT: -- Critical Role.
♪ Critical ♪
♪ Critical ♪
♪ It's Thursday ♪
♪ It's Thursday night! ♪
ASHLEY: ♪ One-by-one, we climb until we reach the top. ♪
♪ Two-by-two, we fall. ♪
LAURA: ♪ Will we meet our end or meet our destiny? ♪
♪ Hold your breath and roll! ♪
MATT: How do you want to do this?
ALL: ♪ It's Thursday night ♪
♪ All ye Critters, come join us ♪
♪ It's time to continue our plight ♪
♪ There is magic and mystery ♪
♪ Who knows what will happen? ♪
♪ He might! ♪
♪ But one thing's for sure, ♪
♪ We never give up on the fight! ♪
LIAM: ♪ From the healer ♪
♪ To the renegade ♪
MATT: ♪ We all share the same goal ♪
MATT and TALIESIN: ♪ Adding more allies ♪
♪ Taking more chances ♪
SAM: ♪ Hold your breath and roll ♪
MARISHA: You can certainly try.
ALL: ♪ It's Thursday night ♪
♪ All ye Critters, come join us ♪
♪ It's time to continue our plight ♪
♪ It's Thursday night. ♪
♪ There is magic and mystery ♪
♪ From darkness, our friendship will rise ♪
♪ But one thing's for sure: ♪
♪ We never give up on the fight ♪
♪ Oh, get ready, ♪
♪ Get ready, ♪
♪ It's Thursday night! ♪
(flames whooshing)
Part I
MATT: And welcome back. So, last we left off, Bells Hells, recently returning to Exandria to find from the ruins of Aeor to find that the western encampment in the Hellcatch, outside of the Malleus Key had been overrun and destroyed. Fleeing to Vasselheim to catch up with Keyleth and the survivors of that incursion, they find that many of the movers and shakers of Exandria have been gathered to Vasselheim to discuss and decide what is to be done here in the rapidly approaching crux of Ludinus and the Vanguard's plan as the impending some sort of incursion or straight up invasion of the Ruidus folk and the Weave Mind's armies here onto Exandria proper. You were present for a number of arguments and discussions here in the Platinum Sanctuary of Vasselheim, where you presented, upon prompting, the information that you had uncovered both upon the moon and some of the other dangers, such as the information that Ludinus may have uncovered in the ruins of Aeor. After stepping away for the evening, you were brought by Keyleth to the Birthheart, one of the most holy places of the Wildmother on the surface of the planet where Orym had a true communion with one of the pantheon. Upon which was gifted a legendary enhancement to Seedling, the blade that carries his past and his hope. After an evening's rest in some weird games of Spin the Bottle. (laughter)
MATT: And a brief bout of oversleeping, you caught up to a handful of loose allies that wished to forge a plan to present to the forum of all of these gathered dignitaries, generals, and political leaders. In meeting with them, you presented the specifics of what you found, what your worries may be, the strengths of your knowledge, the strengths of your connection to Ludinus and his plan. And a plot was hatched. Not to fight through each barrier to get to him, but through the loophole of this singular portal you uncovered, a back door to the red Moon of Ill Omen, to strike all three points at once. Thus, with this plan semi-forged and ready to be presented for approval to the rest of Exandria, you began to exit the Trial Forge. At which point, a familiar and strangely daydream-like psychic incursion takes Imogen's focus as she finds herself pushing through the red dust of her lifelong recurring nightmare, scattered past and reversed to the green, wind tossed fields of the Taloned Highlands where in this vision, her mother has come to her. "Imogen. Are you okay?"
LAURA: I'm fine. How are you here right now?
MATT: "I wanted to reach out and talk to you for a moment quickly, because I know you're likely in the middle of something and I don't have much time myself. I'm doing my part here, slowing what I can on my front. Wanted to come to you because Ludinus has grown impatient since his return and he's keeping me close. He's been watchful. He's been sending off the other Ruidusborn, I believe, to ends I don't know. They're beyond my sight now."
LAURA: Off of the moon, or--?
MATT: "I assume. I do know that he has sent one of his simulacrum with the team to meet with the Sorrowlord, to broker something with the Unseelie in the coming day or two. At something called the Shrine of Gilded Gifts. It's within the Amethyst Gulch Sierras. In his words, he noted that they'd been frustratingly absent partners since the destruction of the twinned key and he needs their help now more than ever."
LAURA: The Unseelie? Okay.
MATT: "So while he stays here, keeping me close, which also allows me to keep him close. He's still making moves. So I just wanted to let you know for whatever help that might be."
LAURA: Thank you. That puts you at a lot of risk.
MATT: "We're all in a lot of risk, aren't we?"
LAURA: If we go there, will he suspect you?
MATT: "He suspects everyone to a certain degree, but I don't think he knows how connected we are."
LAURA: All right.
MATT: "So to that end, we might have that in our favor."
LAURA: Where the are the Weave Mind now?
MATT: "Last I knew, they were off briefly to Exandria."
LAURA: Oh wow.
MATT: "Only just returned recently."
LAURA: All right.
MATT: "They've been terraforming, was the term they used. Reinforcing their assets."
LAURA: They're very powerful.
MATT: "They are."
LAURA: Thank you. Is there any-- Is there anything about him that we can use, if it came down to it?
MATT: "I'll see what more I can find and maybe ask and see. He's been spending a lot of time going back and forth between the Burrow site. We haven't quite reached the Hallowed Cage, which is a good sign, but the closer we get, I-- Maybe all of us feel the pull." Her head turns back over, her shoulder towards nothing.
LAURA: Be safe.
MATT: "I can't stay long."
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: "Imogen. Ludinus is asking me to do something."
LAURA: What?
MATT: "He wants me to channel a memory through a nexus at the leyline on Exandria, something he brought back. I don't know the contents. I don't know the impact, but he's been very emphatic. I don't know if this will impact you."
LAURA: He's relying on you to do this?
MATT: "He says with the Exaltant powers that I carry, at a leyline nexus that should be enough to broadcast."
LAURA: If you can keep it from happening, do so. But if it puts you at risk, Mama, do what it takes to keep his trust.
MATT: "I'll do what I can. I don't want to do it if it'll harm you."
LAURA: It'll harm everyone.
MATT: "So do I or not? Do I make a stand, or do I-- Or do I go through with it and hope for the best? If push comes to shove, it'll reach a breaking point where either I have to or not."
LAURA: If you can keep from doing it and get away. But Mama, if there's somebody else that can do it, if he's just going hurt you and turn to somebody else, Then keep yourself safe for the bigger fight. All right?
MATT: "Okay. Okay. I have to go. Stay safe."
LAURA: I love you.
MATT: "I love you, too." (wind swirls) The winds and dust, the storm, rush in as your vision blinks. You feel the grains of red sand in your eyes and as you squeeze them, the watering of your vision blinking past, you're back in the Trial Forge with the rest of your troop coming back in the chamber, checking in on you as Fearne and Orym are entering back into the war chamber.
LAURA: I tell them everything. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Oh my god!
LAURA: I know. Did I make a mistake? Should I have told her not to do that?
ASHLEY: No, no.
LAURA: But I mean, if he could have had somebody else do it, I think she's better in his pocket, right?
ASHLEY: No, I think you're right.
LAURA: Right there next to him. I think you're right. I think you're right.
TRAVIS: But is her asking to not do it going to cause or cast suspicion on her? Has she been a loyal follower all this time?
LAURA: I don't think she would do anything that would make him suspect her. She's smart.
MATT: Fearne, would you make a history check for me?
ASHLEY: Yeah. You know what? I've been thinking about something. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Ooh! I rolled a natural 19.
LAURA: (gasps)
MATT and TALIESIN: Ooh.
ASHLEY: Plus four. 23.
LAURA: Ooh!
MATT: 23. Okay.
ASHLEY: Wait, wait, wait.
LIAM: What is this?
ASHLEY: I'm getting a download.
LAURA: What is it?
TRAVIS: A download?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
LAURA: Kind of goo.
MATT: Because of your history in the Fey and hearing stories from your surrounding odd family, your menagerie of creatures and such, but especially Nana Morri. When you mentioned, in conveying this story, the Amethyst Gulch, you have heard of this. You've heard story of it being this lucid, purple range of mountain cliffs and wooded valleys that houses a once vibrant Seelie community called the Pravenier. If anyone speaks Elvish here...
LAURA and MARISHA: Nope.
TRAVIS: I do.
MATT: You speak Elvish?
TRAVIS: Friend. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Please, come inside.
LAURA: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Please enter.
MATT: No, Pravenier essentially means the kaleidoscopic tapestry--
MARISHA: Whoa!
LAURA: Ooh, that's pretty.
MATT: -- in Elvish. But there was long ago a mass poisoning of the community here and the site was abandoned. Since, this abandoned city has been slowly reclaimed by the wilds and crystals around it. Many consider this space haunted by spirits who mourn their unfinished works of art. You believe you--
LAURA: Oh, that sounds cool.
MARISHA: Yeah, it does sound cool.
MATT: Some of your friends have snuck over there after these stories and brought back pieces of jewelry for you. You've never visited, but you recall some of these tales.
ASHLEY: I have some items from there.
LIAM: Where in the world is it, Fearne?
MARISHA: He said it's Seelie.
TRAVIS: Is it in the Prime Material Plane?
MATT: No, this is in the Fey Realm.
ASHLEY: It's in the Fey Realm.
TRAVIS: Okay.
MATT: It is not terribly far--
LIAM: We've got to go back.
MATT: -- from the Sablecast Grounds.
ASHLEY: Oh.
MATT: Which is where the--
LAURA: That's where--
MATT: That's where the destroyed Fey Key was.
SAM: Fakie. (Fey Key)
LAURA: Oh, the destroyed Fey Key.
ASHLEY: Fey Key.
TRAVIS: Stupid.
ASHLEY: Wait, and where did we need to go in the Amethyst Gulch Sierras? What is it called?
LIAM: Yeah, Shrine of--
LAURA: The Shrine of Gul--
MATT: The Shrine of Gilded Gifts.
LAURA and LIAM: Gilded Gifts. (laugh)
LAURA: I didn't get there. I was like, I lost it, and I'm just going to move on.
MATT: That's fine.
TRAVIS: What? You didn't get Shrine of Gilded Gifts, Amethyst Gulch Sierra, all in one sentence?
ASHLEY: Sierras?
MATT: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Ss?
ASHLEY: Ss?
ASHLEY and LAURA: (laughs)
ROBBIE: I have a real note.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: I've heard many stories about that place.
MARISHA: You did it!
TRAVIS: Robbie was on that shit.
LAURA: All right.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Chicken scratch king.
LAURA: It sounds-- We should trust it, right? We should trust what she said. We should go there. Stop him.
SAM: Did you trust her?
LAURA: I did.
SAM: She wasn't sending us there to our death?
LAURA: We'll find out, won't we?
LIAM: Yeah, maybe--
TRAVIS: Has she ever reached out before?
LAURA: Since we left the moon? No.
TRAVIS: Ever?
LAURA: No, this is the first time. I would imagine she doesn't get a lot of opportunity.
TRAVIS: It's a trap!
LAURA: I don't think it is.
TRAVIS: You heard it here first, folks.
MARISHA: It could be a trap. Above the table question. She was saying what was happening in the Amethyst Gulch Sierras? We need to go there because why?
MATT: Ludinus sent one of his simulacrum.
ASHLEY: Because it's pretty.
LAURA: Two little spriggies.
LIAM: Is Sorrowlord there?
MATT: Sent the simulacrum with the Sorrowlord--
LIAM: With the Sorrowlord.
MATT: -- to meet with Unseelie diplomats to some degree.
LAURA: So, your dad's going to be there.
MARISHA: Wait, I missed all of that because I was being negged.
LAURA: Sorry.
MATT: Too bad. We've already gone past it, so. (laughter)
TRAVIS: You suck and you lost us the whole arc. (laughter)
MATT: No.
ASHLEY: So he sent the Sorrowlord there to speak with the Unseelie.
MATT: Along with one of his simulacrum.
ASHLEY: Along with one of his simulacrum.
LIAM: His clones.
TRAVIS: His snow cones.
ASHLEY: Yes, yes, yes. Along with his snow cone.
LIAM: Snow clones.
TRAVIS: Snow clones.
MARISHA: Sorrowlord and snow cone--
TALIESIN: Snoopy snow clone.
MARISHA: -- to here, to--
LIAM: Now I want it.
MATT: To broker with the Unseelie.
MARISHA: -- to rally, to probably get some Seelie troops.
LAURA: Rally some troops.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: Exhibiting frustration that they've been less than present as of late, since the destruction of the secondary Key.
LAURA: That means he needs more help.
MARISHA: He's trying to be like--
ASHLEY: He does need more help.
TRAVIS: You're not holding up your end.
MARISHA: Exactly. Where are you in this? You promised.
ASHLEY: I wonder if we could get them on our side.
LAURA: Or if we could stop--
TALIESIN: How?
LAURA: -- the Sorrowlord and the simulacrum before they even get there, and then--
ASHLEY: Yeah.
LAURA: -- the talks never happen.
TALIESIN: We don't even really know what-- What would they want to switch? That is a question.
MARISHA: We already know his deal with the Seelie and the Unseelie was very tenuous. At least that's from what Mr. Wendagoth was saying.
TALIESIN: I was wondering what happened to him, by the way.
MARISHA: I know.
LAURA: Oh yeah, he's still on the moon, isn't he?
MARISHA: Maybe.
ASHLEY: We should check in.
TALIESIN: If we all look up at the same time, can we flash to Ira to see, if we all do this at the same time?
MATT: Unfortunately, can't really edit the camera on this roleplaying game.
TRAVIS: Everybody look up. Everybody look up!
MARISHA: What is Ira doing?
TALIESIN: Right now? (laughter)
MARISHA: Maybe we can have Max just put like a--
MATT: Yeah. Meanwhile...
MARISHA: -- his cloud of him.
TALIESIN: Ira in a bathing suit. (laughter)
ASHLEY: I mean, I could check in on him.
LAURA: ♪ Do do do, do do do ♪
TALIESIN: Actually, can we check in with Ira?
LAURA: I could--
TRAVIS: Scry?
LAURA: Well, we could Scry, potentially.
ASHLEY: We could Scry.
LAURA: I don't think I can send a little message to him on the moon.
TRAVIS: Massage.
LAURA: A massage.
TALIESIN: That would be a very very good ally to have right now.
TRAVIS: Plus, didn't she say that Ludinus sent his snow cone along, so we can't really interrupt it. It's probably happening.
LAURA: I mean, she said in a couple days. A day or two.
TALIESIN: Oh shit.
LAURA: So we'd have to move fast. But you already know the location.
ASHLEY: I do, I do. I have never been there, but I have friends that have been there.
ROBBIE: So we're going to try to do another thing before we do the thing that we're supposed to do? I don't know how much time we have. What's the timeline?
MARISHA: Well, maybe we could do this--
LAURA: I don't know.
MARISHA: -- jump there, come back--
ASHLEY: We do the pitch.
MARISHA: -- talk to more gods, jump to the moon. It's a lot of travel.
LIAM: What would we glean to get into the middle of this meeting?
TRAVIS: The Platinum Sanctuary one?
LIAM: No.
TRAVIS: Oh.
LIAM: Snow clone.
LAURA: No, we would just--
MARISHA: The Seelie Court.
LAURA: Maybe we could try to stop them.
TRAVIS: I wonder if we can use this information to prove our worth in the Platinum Sanctuary.
TALIESIN: That was not what I was thinking, but that's good.
TRAVIS: Totally fresh intel that only we have from a source on the inside.
LAURA: They can send someone.
TRAVIS: Which they will think we are fucking corrupt. But it doesn't matter.
TALIESIN: We could also--
TRAVIS: They could send somebody.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: I mean, if we just wanted to disrupt and not necessarily get involved, this is the exact sort of thing I would be delighted to tell Ira about. The Nightmare King. Sorry, new kids, we've got this guy. He's not really a friend, we just sometimes work together and they're, I don't know, a hot spider? I don't know what else to say to it.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
LAURA: That's a good description.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
SAM: Sounds cool.
TRAVIS: Disco spider.
ASHLEY: Yeah, he's great.
MARISHA: That's true. So the hot spider--
TALIESIN: I don't want to like him.
MARISHA: -- he has a really big grudge, like a big beef with this Sorrowlord guy.
LIAM: Creepy Fey fellow.
MARISHA: Uh-huh.
LAURA: AKA her dad.
MARISHA: Her dad.
ROBBIE: Oh, yeah.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
MARISHA: So maybe, yes, that's actually not a bad idea. Maybe we could hit up Ira and be like, yo. Your quarry.
TALIESIN: I'm right twice a millennia.
MARISHA: Huh?
TALIESIN: I'm right twice a millennia, yeah.
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: I mean, he'd have to be. We'd have to see where he is so that we would be able to send a message to him or else I could try to visit him.
MATT: You encountered him.
ROBBIE: I believe I was going to say. I believe I've met him, but the last time I met him, we just sort of--
MARISHA: You had a fight.
MATT: Yeah, it was not so great.
ROBBIE: Yeah, we sort of kicked--
LIAM: Oh, the tower came down.
ROBBIE: -- his ass and then he disappeared.
TRAVIS: Yes!
LIAM: Yeah.
ROBBIE: Is that correct?
TRAVIS: Exactly what happened.
ROBBIE: But now you guys are friends?
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
TALIESIN: Well, friends is a--
ROBBIE: No, no, no. We like new friends. It's good.
ASHLEY: Friend sounds it's too strong.
ROBBIE: No, no. It's not good.
TRAVIS: Strange bedfellow.
LAURA: No, yeah. He's fine.
TALIESIN: We haven't slept with him yet. Have we slept with him yet?
ASHLEY: He's Fey.
TALIESIN: Just double-checking.
ASHLEY: It's hard to pin down.
ROBBIE: You trust him enough to maybe treat him as an ally.
LAURA: He's helped us.
TALIESIN: He's pretty high.
LAURA: He's helped us.
TRAVIS: Also! Fuck, all the ideas are popping! Woo!
MARISHA: (laughs)
TRAVIS: If we send-- Oh! If we give the Platinum Sanctuary authority to go after the Shrine of the Gilded Gifts--
TALIESIN: Roll a d100 right now.
TRAVIS: -- and they fuck shit up over there!
TALIESIN: (laughs)
MARISHA: Wait, Platinum--
TRAVIS: (shouts) No.
TALIESIN: It was as if would have a heart attack right now from that throw.
TRAVIS: (mimics heart attack) (laughter)
TRAVIS: I'm okay. (coughs) (laughter)
TRAVIS: Oh, it was pretty close. Oh. There's a lot of zeroes on those dice.
TALIESIN: Take your pills.
TRAVIS: If maybe your mom's looking for a way out, if she's telling you, like, ah. I'm going to go do this thing but if you send somebody to stop me, then she doesn't have to complete it and she can be none the wiser or feign ignorance.
MARISHA: With the channeling of the thing with the nexus?
TRAVIS: Yeah. If she's going to Aeor to use the (rumbling) thing.
LAURA: She's not going to Aeor.
TRAVIS: Or whatever leyline nexus they were talking about. It's got to be something from that.
TALIESIN: Also.
MARISHA: Did she say which leyline nexus?
LAURA: Nope.
MARISHA: Well, well.
LAURA: Did she?
MATT: She did not.
MARISHA: Well, though. Hang on. Because?
ASHLEY: The big one.
SAM: The big one, yeah.
MARISHA: The big one.
SAM: The Bloody Bridge.
LAURA: That's-- It's--
MARISHA: Yes. It's got to be the Bloody Bridge, right? Because we know that it's converging. right?
MATT: It could be. There are multiple nexuses across Exandria.
TRAVIS: Whitestone.
MATT: When the leylines shift during the solstice.
LIAM: Isn't there one way over the city, right?
MATT: There's one right over Vasselheim. There's a number. There's one over the--
TALIESIN: Does Whitestone has one or no?
TRAVIS: Marquet has one, right?
TALIESIN: I think Marquet has one.
MATT: Marquet has one. I mean, there are a number of them. There's one over the Dreemoth Ravine after the split. Team Issylra ended up appearing underneath.
TALIESIN: Yeah. I thought Whitestone didn't have one.
MATT: No, right. No. The leylines are still visible in the sky and they're tangling. So Whitestone does not have one.
TALIESIN: No. We're not interesting enough for that.
LAURA: It's an interesting idea, though.
TRAVIS: Fuck yeah, it is! I'm hot today!
TALIESIN: We could also talk to Meema Morri may know where Ira is. I mean, they got a thing going on, right?
MARISHA: I wonder.
LAURA: Ashton's very into Ira.
TALIESIN: Grandma.
MARISHA: I wonder, too, if, even if we don't know where Liliana is going to tap into to do this transmission. If we know when she's going to do it, maybe our Ruidusborn over here can also tap in and cause interference, static, like a technical difficulty card.
TRAVIS: Your fingers are coming loose when you do that.
MARISHA: Snap it back into place.
ASHLEY: It's like, (static)
LAURA: Maybe, maybe.
MARISHA: Another thing! You're right. The ideas are hot right now!
TRAVIS: I'm telling you!
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: All right. The other thing is. We know Ludinus for centuries has been going to the Feywild and murdering fey to suck them into his body to prolong his life.
LAURA: They don't like him.
MARISHA: Yeah. Do the Seelie know this? Do the Seelie or the Unseelie or literally. Does anyone know?
LAURA: Do they know he's been killing off all of the big fey creatures?
MARISHA: Yes!
ASHLEY: Well I mean, Zathuda doesn't like him.
MARISHA: Because I just wonder if it's like, hey.
LAURA: (laughs)
MARISHA: This person, you have a tentative deal with.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MARISHA: He's been preying on your people for a long time, so maybe you should be mad at him.
ASHLEY: Yeah. Maybe, maybe.
TRAVIS: He's making a treaty with the Unseelie not the Seelie, right? Or flip that bitch?
MATT: From what you understand, the Unseelie have been the faction that he's been dallying with for a number of years.
ASHLEY: So what if we go to the Seelie and be like, guess what they're doing?
MARISHA: But you said this, the Provincia are Seelie?
ASHLEY: Pravianier?
MATT: The Pravianier was a Seelie location that has been abandoned since.
ASHLEY: Oh, that's what's it.
MATT: In the Amethyst Gulch Sierras.
ASHLEY: That was a Seelie location.
MATT: It was long ago, before it was abandoned and retaken by the landscape.
ASHLEY: To the poison.
LAURA: (laughs)
TRAVIS: I think we're ready. Let's go!
ROBBIE: We're ready to save Imogen's mother, recruit Fey Realm allies, infiltrate the moon, recruit our friend Ira? I'm just confused. What order? What? What? What?
ASHLEY: We have so much to do!
ROBBIE: We can do it all.
MATT: (laughing)
ROBBIE: I'm down to try it all.
LAURA: I think that's the plan.
LIAM: I think we're just going shopping right now, right?
LAURA: Yeah, just shopping.
MATT: Just getting.
ASHLEY: I'm glad we slept.
LAURA: And then grab dinner in the butt of the Titan.
ROBBIE: I just though we had a plan, and now it's seems like we've got a lot of plans. I'll do whatever you want, but.
TRAVIS: Braius, have you been to the Fey Realm?
TALIESIN: It's more like, a couple plans with a lot of steps.
SAM: I have not been to the Fey Realm. Have you?
TRAVIS: Yes.
ASHLEY: Yeah. That's where I'm from.
SAM: And we can just be there?
TALIESIN: It's not the moon.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Easier than the moon.
LAURA: Well, maybe.
TALIESIN: Well, that's--
ASHLEY: I mean, it depends.
LAURA: She knows where some doors are.
SAM: Yeah?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TRAVIS: It takes a little effort, but time is weird.
ASHLEY: Yeah, time is a little weird, so maybe.
ROBBIE: Speaking of time, when does our meeting start, or--?
LAURA: Where's our group? Have they left us? So unless--
TALIESIN: It starts when we get there.
MATT: I assume this was a kind of walk and talk.
TALIESIN: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: Since you are all traveling through daytime Vasselheim heading towards the Platinum Sanctuary.
TRAVIS: Every time we pass a Judicator or something. (mumbling) Yeah, we pick it back up.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
MATT: Which indeed is one of the-- Now that you've witnessed a few in the wild, you can see now, in the daytime, too, like the bright light you couldn't make out in the chaos of your arrival necessarily. You might have seen in passing. But, at certain points in the city, especially very civilian dense locales, you can see there are a number of bastion clusters, Vasselheim bastions that are armored and at the ready, keeping watch. Very vigilant about anyone that either seems untrustworthy or keeping an eye out for any undue strange magics. As you get to the base of the steps to the Platinum Sanctuary, it is flanked by two Judicators of Vasselheim. Their massive eyeless iron masks scrawled and runed in front, hoods up, arms crossed. And just walking, even just being in their presence, you can feel that invisible force. That (vibrating) presence. As you begin to ascend the steps with the rest of your troop, even just having one of them turn its head in your direction causes this cold strike to sit down your spine. You continue up the stairs as the rest of the various guardians, protectors, and soldier escorts begin to carry their various associates up towards the forum. Heading back now. A beautiful daytime view. The gray skies above still having the gentle, element of left over not quite a full snowfall, but the occasional flake that falls as the bit of sunlight breaks through the bits of cloud, and you can see it lighting up like a silver shine across the distant snow covered fields and the tops of the Vesper Timberland that surround Vasselheim here in the valley. You step up to the upper area and there is a soft layer of snow that sits at the edge of the cliff. The heavy platforms of marble that set the base of the Platinum Sanctuary and you can't help but shoot your eyes up at the space where that silver dragon was last night that is no longer on top of the structure.
LAURA: Cool.
LIAM: Is it anywhere? If I do a 180.
MATT: Make a perception check.
TRAVIS: 34.
LIAM: No. It's pretty low. It is a 24.
MATT: 24. You do not see any sight of a dragon at the moment. You check a number of other flying creatures and--
ASHLEY: Who is that big boy?
MATT: -- flocks of other large feathered birds in the distance, but nothing draconic in sight.
LIAM: Okay.
MATT: You all begin to step into the forum, the crowds pushing close. You make out a lot of familiar faces as you step in, pretty much everyone who was present last night, as well as some other clusters of new figures. some later arrivals, people that are filtering in now given the current circumstances. As the room settles a bit, the crowd is still murmuring. There's about 15 minutes or so of organization within the clusters of people. You can see your troop scatters a little bit, having small private side conversations with other figures, transpiring to a number of scattered exchanges that are prepping the tone of the conversation to come before everything is called to order. Is there anything you wish to do in this short period of time before, or plot, or discuss before the actual gathering is called to order?
LAURA: How much are we reveal-- We're going to let the high ups do most of the talking? And then--
SAM: I think we'll have to do some.
TRAVIS: Save our secret info until people start accusing us of being shysters.
SAM: If you have to speak, I believe in you strongly.
ROBBIE: Oh, well.
SAM: My faith is in you. I will give you inspiration.
ROBBIE: Oh! Oh!
ASHLEY: Ooh!
SAM: What you said about your family last night was very touching.
ROBBIE: Thank you.
TRAVIS: I've got faith in you, and my finger.
ROBBIE: Certainly. (laughter)
LIAM: It's a big finger. (laughter)
ROBBIE: Don't underestimate me.
TRAVIS: Moo! (laughter)
TALIESIN: He's got--
ROBBIE: What is your inspiration?
SAM: Just a six.
MARISHA: I think the "do not shares," right, the things that we do not want to tell are--
TRAVIS: Secret entrance.
MARISHA: Secret entrance, our back door and--
LAURA: (laughs)
LIAM: ♪ Secret door ♪
MARISHA: ♪ Open your back door, baby ♪ -- and then, that your mom is--
TRAVIS: Dishing out.
LAURA: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Secret entrance, secret back door, and your mom.
MARISHA: The back door and your mom.
MATT: (laughs)
ROBBIE: But if we tell them this information about--
MATT: Oh my god.
LAURA: How do you know?
ROBBIE: They will press us for how we know about your mother.
LAURA: We'll just have to say, look--
SAM: Trust us.
LAURA: We can't give that up or they could be in danger and we would lose our--
LIAM: Can't give up your sources.
TRAVIS: It would jeopardize the source.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Jeopardize the mission.
ROBBIE: Aren't there many powerful people in this room? Don't they have means of making us tell the truth?
LIAM: Chock-a-block, yes.
TRAVIS: I'll be in there, you're right.
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: I'm going to cast on all of us Telepathic Bond before we go in that room.
LIAM: Cool.
TRAVIS: Nice!
LAURA: So that if we're freaking out, we can talk to each other.
LIAM: Are we in the hallway outside, or are we in there with lots of hubbub happening?
MATT: You're inside. You're not fully in the chamber yet. Everyone's just scattered and talking. It is very crowded in this entryway. The main open, more or less like a large foyer entryway with the high pillars, the massive high ceiling that sits 60, 70 feet above you with beautiful architecture and platinum carved reliefs that show shapes and designs that seem to be reminiscent of bits of history or iconography that tells facets of the tenets of the Platinum Dragon. It's beautiful above, and it is very crowded. It's like a Comic-Con show floor in here almost as you're pushing into it.
TALIESIN: Oh god, why?
MATT: Smells a little better.
LIAM: If I hop up the side of a column to get a view at the entire crowd and take a minute to scan, does Orym see anyone that we would be unhappy to see here?
MATT: Make a perception check.
LIAM: I'll reroll the one. Dang it. That is a 25.
MATT: 25. As far as new figures here, you don't see anybody that catches you off guard unexpected or sets you on edge. Make a history check as well, if you don't mind.
LIAM: That's a natural 20 for a total of 32.
TRAVIS: Good Lord!
MATT: Woo!
ROBBIE: Dang!
TALIESIN: What symbol is that?
LIAM: That's a pie.
TALIESIN: Oh shit!
TRAVIS: That's a pie.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: That's cute.
ROBBIE: That is the whole pie.
TALIESIN: So it is.
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: Huh.
LIAM: Now I want pie.
TALIESIN: I know.
MATT: Okay.
TRAVIS: Oh!
ASHLEY: Oh!
TRAVIS: I love it.
ASHLEY: Whispers.
LIAM: Reading is fundamental!
SAM: A whisper? Tell us about that cardigan.
LAURA: It's really soft and cozy.
TALIESIN: It feels good.
ROBBIE: Is it embroidered on the front?
LAURA: It is. It is embroidered with a Whitestone logo.
TRAVIS: Is it drapey?
ROBBIE: Wow!
LAURA: It's drapey and classy.
SAM: Does it have pockets?
TALIESIN: I didn't look for--
LAURA: No, it doesn't have pockets.
TALIESIN: I don't think so.
LAURA: It doesn't have pockets. But it would ruin the line, that's why we didn't do it.
SAM: You're right.
LAURA: It's so sleek.
SAM: You're right
TALIESIN: You wear the pocket--
LAURA: There's a reason.
TALIESIN: The pockets are either in the--
MARISHA: ♪ Hot Pockets ♪
TALIESIN: -- in the chinos that you're wearing or you could have a nice vest with a small pocket.
LAURA: These would look great with a pair of jeans. These look like vests that I've seen Liam wear.
LIAM: I'm going to wear that shit out of that cardigan.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Yeah, no, that's--
SAM: I'll shit all over that cardigan.
LAURA: In that cardigan.
TALIESIN: I'm going to walk around with a bubble pipe.
LIAM: (laughs)
ROBBIE: (puffing bubbles)
TRAVIS: Matty, as the room starts to settle, I'll take out the Monocle of True Essence--
TALIESIN: I love a bubble pipe.
TRAVIS: -- and just affix it so that I look super noble, and I'll also cast See Invisibility, so I can see what's happening up in this bitch.
MARISHA: Hell yes. Dragons walking around?
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
TRAVIS: Not on my dime!
LAURA: We have Telepathic Bond.
MATT: Okay.
LAURA: We have Telepathic Bond. We can all communicate without saying anything out loud.
TRAVIS: I don't know.
MARISHA: I'm not paying for these dragons!
TALIESIN: Wait, Telepathy is working with everybody?
LAURA: All of us.
TALIESIN: I'm going to think at Chet, then.
TRAVIS: Great minds.
ROBBIE: Good.
TALIESIN: You look like the Monopoly guy just rolled out of bed.
TRAVIS: I wish I had a cane.
ASHLEY: Wait, is someone going to be doing the talking here?
SAM: We're figuring it out as we go.
LAURA: Yeah. Before we go in, I'm going to pull Fearne aside and say: Just so the air is clear before we go in there and risk our--
ASHLEY: What's up?
SAM: I just want to tell you, I had no idea you were spoken for. I wouldn't have been flirty with you if I had known that you were already with someone.
ASHLEY: Oh, whoa whoa whoa.
SAM: I'm sorry.
ASHLEY: No, no, no.
SAM: I don't want to dishonor you like that.
ASHLEY: No, no, no. No, no, no, no, no. That doesn't dishonor me. (laughter)
ASHLEY: I--
SAM: But you're clearly coupled up--
ASHLEY: No. Here's the thing.
SAM: -- in a long-term relationship and I don't want to sully that.
LAURA: As you hold the tongue.
ASHLEY: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah, I'm going to stop playing with that. Listen.
SAM: I noticed that you were canoodling, so I just--
ASHLEY: Yes, but I can canoodle who I want to canoodle with.
TRAVIS: Oh, okay.
ASHLEY: I don't know, I haven't made any decisions yet. I'm sorry. I don't know. It's the end of the world. I don't want to put all my-- It feels like it's the end of the world. I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket. Maybe I'll put my eggs in all the baskets.
SAM: Does he know this?
ASHLEY: I-- I have a feeling--
TALIESIN: (laughs)
ASHLEY: -- that they probably know that I'm a free bird. You know, I'm a free wheeling--
SAM: They probably know?
TRAVIS: Free bird.
ASHLEY: Yeah, but maybe a conversation--
SAM: In my experience, it's best to be up front with these things.
ASHLEY: Absolutely. Listen.
LIAM: No lies.
ASHLEY: I think they're great, and I just-- I don't know what I want.
SAM: Do you want me to talk to them about this?
ASHLEY: No!
ASHLEY: Well, what would you say?
SAM: Just figure out, just ask them what their take on the situation is. What do you guys think? What do you think your status is? That sort of thing. Then I could tell you--
ASHLEY: Oh, just to see what they're thinking?
SAM: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Okay, yeah. Because I don't know if this is just like--
TALIESIN: I love you, Sam.
ASHLEY: -- hey, this is an end of the world hookup or like, I really actually like you. I don't know what I want, and I'm still figuring that out. I think they're fantastic. I think everybody's fantastic in this group. If anybody-- I don't know. I don't know what I want. I don't want to be tied down. It makes me a little nervous.
SAM: Okay.
ASHLEY: What's your deal?
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: (gasp)
SAM: What do you mean?
ASHLEY: I'm not proposing anything. I'm just asking.
SAM: Of course not.
ASHLEY: Since you're asking me.
SAM: What do you mean? What's my deal? Like, what are you? Are you with anybody?
TRAVIS: Wow.
SAM: I--
ASHLEY: I'm not asking for myself. I'm asking for in general.
SAM: For someone else?
SAM: Did someone else say something?
ASHLEY: I don't know, I don't know. Maybe.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
ASHLEY: I don't know.
SAM: Well, who was it? Was it the little warrior?
ASHLEY: I don't know.
SAM: Because he is fine. (laughter)
LIAM: Shut up, baby. I know it.
ASHLEY: Yeah. The little warrior is really something else. (laughter)
ASHLEY: The little warrior is great. Listen. No need to be so serious.
SAM: I don't--
ASHLEY: I just--
SAM: I don't trot because I'm a cow. But if I did, I would be hot to trot. (laughter)
SAM: I-- I'm looking.
ASHLEY: You're looking?
SAM: I don't know if that was apparent, but--
ASHLEY: Is there anything in particular that you're looking for or you'll know it when you see it?
LAURA: ♪ T-R-O-T ♪
SAM: I mean. Not to be too forward, but--
ASHLEY: Because I have a feeling.
SAM: -- you checked a lot of boxes.
MARISHA: Oh boy.
ASHLEY: Oh, I mean. I know.
LAURA: Oh my god.
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Listen.
MARISHA: (laughs)
ASHLEY: I think you should feel it out with Ashton and maybe see what their vibe is, you know.
SAM: For me or for you?
TRAVIS: Wow. Is that a redirect?
ASHLEY: Sure.
SAM: Oh!
ASHLEY: I don't know.
TALIESIN: Wow!
TRAVIS: Did you ricochet off the atmosphere?
ASHLEY: I don't know. Listen. Do what you want. Live your life. Probably not that much time left. That's the way I see it. And... Anyway.
SAM: I flustered you.
ASHLEY: Let's go to the moon. You did. I'm flustered because it's hot.
MATT: About this time, the crowd--
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: -- is now filtering into the forum chamber. I hope you've taken this time to really figure out the important facets and preparation for this meeting.
ASHLEY: Yeah, of course.
LIAM: Dorian, you hear my voice in your head. Could you meet me over by the entrance real quick?
ROBBIE: Sure. Have I ever heard him in my head before? No? What are you--?
LIAM: Well, she has linked us all.
LAURA: I gave us all Telepathic Bond.
ROBBIE: Oh, is that what that does? Oh okay.
LAURA: Uh-huh. So now we can.
MATT: But you were bound in Aeor, I believe. At certain points, weren't you? Were you telepathically bound in the Aeor? I'm trying to remember.
LAURA: Maybe FCG did it. I don't think I've ever done it for all of us.
MATT: That's right. So this might be the first time you've heard it. We'll play it as such.
ROBBIE: Okay. Yeah.
LAURA: I think.
LIAM: It's Orym, it's me.
ROBBIE: Mm-hmm. Well yeah. I recognize your voice. Voice? Yes.
LIAM: Column on the left.
ROBBIE: Okay. I'll be super sneaky about it. And I'll walk in the least sneaky way to where--
LIAM: Well, I'm hanging off the side of a column. Kind of at eye level right now.
ROBBIE: Casual walk.
LIAM: Yeah.
ROBBIE: Okay.
MATT: Most of the crowd is filtering in now. You both go through hanging back and peeling away as it's starting to form the gallery, if you will.
LIAM: I plant my hand on your shoulder and say: I'm going to be subtle about this and I might be crazy, but is that gentleman over there familiar to you? And I lean in close to you and point past your chin at an individual across the chamber.
MATT: Who just vanishes into the crowd.
ROBBIE: Oh!
MATT: Because everyone's going into the forum.
ROBBIE: Familiar?
LAURA: Who was it?
ROBBIE: In what way?
LIAM: Shit.
ROBBIE: Anything I can do to try to-- Or is he just gone? He's vanished.
MATT: By the time he points it out, and you point in the direction and he's not there anymore. Like the mass of people is now pushing into the forum.
LIAM: So I don't speak. I just stare at you. But you hear: He kind of looked like you. A lot.
LAURA: (gasps)
ROBBIE: Did you see anything more? Any markings? How old was he?
LIAM: Older? Finely dressed.
ROBBIE: Was he cloaked or? His hair? Anything else?
LIAM: Well, that's up to--
MATT: The glance that you saw, darker salt and pepper hair. Like billowing light-colored regal silks.
LIAM: I recount that.
MATT: Yeah. Familiar features.
ROBBIE: Well.
MARISHA: (giggles)
ROBBIE: That's interesting.
LIAM: You know. You, but aged like finer wine.
ROBBIE: I know what you're getting at. He always favored mother. I always favored him. All right.
LIAM: Keep your eyes peeled. He's got to be in here somewhere.
ROBBIE: No. Surely not. All right. I'll shake it off.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: Did you just turn lavender? (laughter)
ROBBIE: Oh! Yeah, I'm all right. I don't think this changes anything.
TALIESIN: I couldn't hear any of that, so I just saw you. I just saw, I just--
ROBBIE: Oh, yeah. Okay.
TALIESIN: That was private.
LAURA: Yeah. We can have little smaller conversations like this in telepathic mode.
TALIESIN: All right.
ROBBIE: Okay, I got you.
TALIESIN: I will put you on the list of please don't let me say anything stupid.
LAURA: Mine works different than FCG's. When FCG did it, everybody heard everything. But when I do it.
LIAM: I'm built different.
ASHLEY: You can have--
LAURA: You can have individual conversations.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
ROBBIE: Okay.
MATT: (laughs)
MATT: As you're all filtering in, because you have your See Invisibility on, as everyone filters into the chamber, you can see, surrounding the massive forum interior, these massive half pillars. There's full pillars that hold up and are the load-bearing structures of this massive forum. And there are like these beautiful half pillars that are carved up about 20 feet off the ground that almost look like hands holding the air above it than from the night before-- However, today they are full on each of these pillars. You see these 12-foot tall, broad, massive, shiny platinum metal, intricately scrolled, and carved golems. They are just, you see what looks like six of them that are all just standing vigilant over, invisibly over this entire chamber, just watching. Their fists themselves are probably about that big each. Just these battering ram creatures. And they are just quietly, invisibly, overseeing the interior of this chamber, and as you step into the forum proper, you glance up and you can see the beautiful, intricate designs of the ceiling above there that you saw the night before are slightly obscured because that silver dragon that was on top of the structure the night before is currently now latched onto the ceiling from above, its claws dug into what look like set handhold points designed for this entity. And itself sits vigilant and invisible at the top of this chamber as well. So you have the sense that, one, this place is pretty well safeguarded, considering, at the moment and also don't do anything stupid.
TRAVIS: Comms check. Comms check. Radio alert. (stressed sigh) There are invisible golems. I count six. Repeat! Six golems up on the support pillars. They are fucking massive. Their hands are bigger than me. Plus, if you all remember that beastie, that shiny-ass dragon that was on top of the place? He's on the underside of the roof. Just perched. Invisible.
ASHLEY: Don't look. Don't look!
TRAVIS: Don't look?! God!
ROBBIE: I can't help myself. (snaps fingers) And I cast See Invisibility as well. (laughter)
MATT: (multiple buzzing poofs)
ROBBIE: (frightened gasps)
TRAVIS: Calm your breathing. Calm your breathing! Calm your breathing!
MATT: Now, as you glance up and start feeling like, your breath starts quickening. You glance up and see the dragon and the dragon, whose head is tucked in, just goes (snarls) and seems to meet your gaze for just a second.
ROBBIE: Just a little bit, there's a little bit of peepee. Just a little. (laughter)
ROBBIE: Just a little bit.
TRAVIS: (forced) How are you doing, Dorian?
ROBBIE: (very normal) I'm just fine. What a wonderful event.
TRAVIS: I concur.
ROBBIE: I hope everything goes well.
TRAVIS: Me too. (laughter)
MATT: As everyone begins to set into place, many of the familiar figures and a few unfamiliar figures take their seats around this recently put together, denser form than its initial construction was designed to hold. But nevertheless, everyone sets into place. The Bright Queen gets on her pedestal. The Tal'Dorei council members get on their pedestal. Allura gets on hers. Keyleth gets on hers. All of the various members of the hierocracy of Vasselheim take their positions. You can see members of the Chandei Quorum. You can see Dwendalian Empire, Nicodranas, and the Clovis Concord, and other figures you don't quite recognize set up in this space as the Highbearer Vord once again breaks the silence. "Thank you all for gathering within our sanctum, faces new and old. Aeshanadoor, Lyrengorn, gathered Ashari, disparate representatives from across the world. We appreciate your presence." There are some nods and some voices. One man you see, dark, beautiful brown skin, long black hair a number of tattoos across his body, adorned ceremonial arm guards that go down each arm, as well as red and brown vibrantly colored pants. Stands forward and gives a nod and says, "The crisis orbs have been set alight and we came to witness."
SAM: Crisis orbs.
MATT: You recognize--
ASHLEY: Cool.
MATT: -- Orym, this to be Cerkonos.
LAURA: (gasps)
LIAM: Hey!
MATT: Flamespeaker of Pyrah and the Fire Ashari.
LIAM: Dimensions collide!
TRAVIS: This bitch. This bitch.
ROBBIE: Funny.
TRAVIS: He sounds like--
MATT: (clears throat) (laughter)
TRAVIS: (mumbling like Cerkonos)
SAM: Me, but a little deeper.
ROBBIE: Very confident. (laughter)
MATT: The High Hierophant Ophera steps up. "With the echoes of the solstice still dangling and twisting our world's balance, we fight to keep order. The Ruby Vanguard is obscured in motion, Ludinus Da'leth vanished within his plots, and a fortress manifested around the bridge that anchors the Moon of Ill Omen to our tides. We, the righteous peoples of Exandria, struggle to get our footing. We need to reclaim our ground and shift that power, and time is absolutely of the essence. A number of you have taken this evening to gather your thoughts and present means of putting us in a position of power and control. Now is the time to make this presence known." There is a pause of glances looking around. You see Marquis Zhafe Uludan of Nicodranas in the back like, "(clears throat)" clears his throat and about to step up at which point, Vex'ahlia goes, "Yes, we'd like to bring this immediately to bear. Not him, us. Right now."
TRAVIS: (laughs)
MATT: "Thank you."
TRAVIS: Hot.
MATT: Everyone settles down. The Marquis shoots a glare and sits into his seat. She looks across the chamber and she gets up. Allura gets up across the way. Groon gets up. As they begin to step down, the Bright Queen gets up and the other three stop, nod, and the four of them gather not in the center of the chamber, but representing the corners of the forum where they stand.
TRAVIS: Draw it.
MATT: Vex'ahlia looks up to the rest of the group. "I am a representative of the Council of Tal'Dorei and many of my compatriots here I've known for some time." (soft giggling)
MATT: "While politics might be many of your fortes, we are people of action--"
MARISHA: Yes.
MATT: "-- which is what we need now."
MARISHA: Correct.
MATT: Groon picks up. "We know the dangers we all face. We know how quickly things can get out of hand, and we know at this time, trust is important. This city, these people have been kept safe directly at the hand of some of those present, and I put the faith of the Dawn Marshalls behind them." You see the tension slackens a bit from some of the other members of the hierocracy. They look about each other, like: Where to start? Allura goes, "As discussed the night before, the three main positions of danger in mounting, well, terror, to be entirely honest, on the side of our opposition stands with this Malleus Key, this recently erected fortress that keeps it at bay, and the arrival of this," she glances over in the direction of the rest of you. "Sunder King, this high general of the Ruidian armies who is protecting it, perhaps even being the tip of the spear for this invasion. Beyond that, we have the extremely powerful, dangerous, and not entirely understood Weave Mind, these psychic tyrannical powers upon the moon and deeply set allies of the Ruby Vanguard. And indeed, we have Ludinus Da'leth himself and his deeply kept compatriots and the Ruidusborn that we've lost to his ventures, of which look to pierce the center of the red moon and set free that which wishes to devour our pantheon. These three points, to assail one is to let the others have time to prepare, to quicken, to succeed. Thus, we assail them at once, simultaneously. I believe we have the means." She nods to Vex'ahlia. Vex'ahlia steps forward now into the center of the chamber. As she steps in the middle, the Highbearer Vord glances up into the chamber and goes, "Athudashionus."
TRAVIS: Athudashionus.
MARISHA: Athudashionus?
MATT: The illusion of the invisibility fades as the silver dragon at the top of the chamber makes itself known. Its eyes flash and the center of the chamber washes over with a faint expanding curtain of just barely visible golden energy and a wave washes past you, familiar to those of you who were partaking in your game the night before. I need all of you to make a charisma saving throw.
LAURA: The whole room is Zone of Truthed?
MATT: Mm-hmm.
ROBBIE: Dang.
TRAVIS: Damn!
ROBBIE: Dang.
MARISHA: Cool.
ROBBIE: All right, that's good. Big boy.
TRAVIS: We could do that.
ROBBIE: Big boy, big boy.
MARISHA: You said charisma saving throw.
MATT: Mm-hmm.
ROBBIE: Ho ho!
LAURA: Did you roll high?
LIAM: I'm going to do Indomitable and do a reroll.
LAURA: We're all going to roll shit.
TRAVIS: Bleh!
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: All right. We'll go around the chamber over here.
TALIESIN: Seven!
MATT: Seven, that is a failure. While in this zone, you are incapable of directly lying.
SAM: Charisma save.
TALIESIN: Awesome.
LIAM: Big six.
MATT: Big six. You also are affected by the dragon's Zone of Truth.
LAURA: 18.
MATT: 18. You are also affected by the dragon's Zone of Truth.
LIAM: Wow.
SAM: Whoa!
LAURA: Well, I rolled real low.
ASHLEY: 19?
MATT: 19. You are affected by the dragon Zone of Truth.
ASHLEY: I wasn't excited about it.
TRAVIS: Silver dragon, man.
SAM: 20?
MATT: 20. You just barely save on the Zone of Truth.
TALIESIN: Wow!
LIAM: Thank you, Lord of Lies!
LAURA: God, thank goodness.
SAM: Yeah.
TALIESIN: That could've been amazing.
SAM: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
ROBBIE: The rizz-ler nat 20! (cheering)
MATT: Woo!
LIAM: The bards! Dude, the bards!
MATT: Hell yeah. Yeah. You are also unaffected.
ROBBIE: Plus eight, so 28.
ROBBIE: Sweet.
MARISHA: Also 28.
MATT: 28!
TRAVIS: Dang!
MATT: Also unaffected by the Zone of Truth.
TRAVIS: Is this an ancient silver dragon?
MARISHA: Well, I got a plus 10.
ROBBIE: Plus 10?!
MATT: Based on its size?
TRAVIS: Size?
MATT: Yes.
MARISHA: Sorcerer shit.
TRAVIS: I rolled a 12.
TALIESIN: Yeah, okay.
SAM: Wait. Silver or platinum?
MATT: It looks like a silver or platinum color. You're uncertain.
MARISHA: Did you roll low?
SAM: I studied in the Platinum House in Zadash.
MATT: Oh you did, yeah.
SAM: Do I know anything about this?
TRAVIS: Athudashionus?
MATT: Go ahead and make a religion check for me.
ASHLEY: Athudashionus?
ROBBIE: Mm! Mm-hmm!
ASHLEY: That's a cool name.
TRAVIS: Have you slept with this dragon?
ROBBIE: (laughs)
SAM: 16 plus--
LAURA: He said it with an accent.
ASHLEY: Athudashionus?
LAURA: Athudashionus.
SAM: 22.
MATT: 22, yes. This is indeed a silver dragon.
SAM: A silver dragon.
MATT: This is a silver dragon. And this dragon is--
TRAVIS: Ancient.
MATT: It is an ancient silver dragon that has been long charged with the protection of the Platinum Sanctuary and is considered one of the-- What's the term I'm looking for? One of the religiously touted and worshipped guardians of the Platinum Dragon's sanctuary and worshippers of the city.
TRAVIS: I don't think we've met an ancient metallic dragon.
SAM: Well, J'mon.
MATT: You have, J'mon Sa Ord.
TRAVIS: Besides J'mon.
LAURA: Just kidding.
MATT: By the way, who's in the chamber.
ASHLEY: JK.
MATT: So there is also present--
ROBBIE: You've met him.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LAURA: An ancient dragon.
TALIESIN: Is J'mon looking up going--
MATT: Though you would not necessarily know that information.
TALIESIN: -- meh.
MATT: But above table? Yes.
LAURA: Woo!
ASHLEY: Do we see Athudashionus right now?
MATT: Athudashionus has presented itself with the casting of the spell for the chamber.
ASHLEY: (surprised shriek)
MATT: There is an audible (gasps) within the chamber. Some people expect it. Some people smile and nod. Some folks instinctually back up for a second.
ASHLEY: Oh shit. (laughter)
MATT: All right, so. Note your status should a deception decide to want to rear itself.
TRAVIS: Fail.
LAURA: Fail.
TALIESIN: This is not one of the dragons that's from Downfall, right? Just double checking. I know it's a big mess. Yeah, it's jumbling my head.
TRAVIS: It is not Bolo.
TALIESIN: I would love to be like, I saw your film! You were great.
MATT: It is not Bolo.
ASHLEY: Bolo.
LIAM: I lived, bitch.
SAM and ASHLEY: I am Bolo.
MATT: But because that vision is still fresh in your mind, there is a moment where you have to reconcile the differences and ensure that is the case.
TALIESIN: Yeah, I'm having a moment.
TRAVIS: Wants to be a reporter.
TRAVIS and MARISHA: (laugh)
TRAVIS: I think she's got a bright future.
ASHLEY: Big boy!
MARISHA: Long live Bolo.
MATT: As this washes over, Vex'ahlia kind of-- "So, we propose the first prong of this is to gather intel and layout of this new keep, this Malleus Keep, if you will. Track the arrival of these Ruidian forces, their organization, where they lay about this keep. Then from there, develop our attack plans, call forth many of the gathered heroes that are present here and abroad to champion the charge supported by the might and the war machine of Exandria that can be spared from the defense of their various homelands and cities. The Slayer's Take, the Onyx Edge, the Stubborn Stock, the Flames Within, and any and all mercenary companies that are available and willing. We all know we have the coffers. The intent is," she smiles, "whether by cunning or force," she glances over to Keyleth, "to deliver the legends known as Vox Machina to the Malleus Key."
SAM: Oh shit!
MARISHA: What is up! Let's fucking go!
MATT: There's a bit of murmuring and whispering and there's a little bit of a chuckle to the crowd and a couple of folks that are kind of like, "What?" She goes, "We once stopped a god and saved this city. We can destroy a ruddy tower." Everyone shuts up.
TALIESIN: Ready.
MATT: And she steps back. Allura takes the center of the chamber. "The next order of business is the assassination of the Weave Mind. Now we have confirmed means of delivering specific strike teams onto Ruidus without the use of the Bloody Bridge, and we will prepare them to strike simultaneously. The first to infiltrate the center of the red moon's capital city at the instruction of and preparation of Evoroa, our Ruidian ally." She looks back towards the edge of the chamber where she was sitting, and Evoroa, hood down, puts a hand up. "So this first team will rush to the sanctum of the Weave Mind, the monstrous, tyrannical, psychic cabal that reigns over that realm. I would offer a trustworthy, clever, and capable crew who have more than once staved off and ended cosmic threats to Exandria of a similar nature, or from the shadows of history. They've already been instrumental in our work against Ludinus. So I put forth my recommendation for the Mighty Nein of Wildemount to be set to this task. Their experience, skills, and resilience to our enemy's strengths makes them our standout choice."
TRAVIS: God!
MATT: There's a bit of reticence in the chamber and you hear a voice in the back go, "I've never heard of this Mighty Nein."
MARISHA: Yeah.
MATT: "Yes, we have no assurance they're capable of this. What assurances can you give us?" The Bright Queen steps into the center of the chamber.
SAM: Oh shit!
MATT: You watch as the voices get quiet and whispers echo throughout the chamber. As she steps forward, you can see her long cape of lavender chainmail scrapes across the marble ground--
LAURA: Sick.
ASHLEY: Cool.
MATT: -- giving this sound of soft distant rainfall.
LIAM: I love her so much.
MATT: As she takes the middle.
ASHLEY: I love her.
MATT: She takes out her staff and--
LAURA: I like to think all of these comments are in our heads.
MATT: -- slams it on the ground.
MARISHA: We're like, damn!
LAURA: She's so cool.
MARISHA: Yaas, queen. Slay.
MATT: The dodecahedron shape at the top of her staff alights brightly. "I know and have met, worked, and put my trust within this Mighty Nein myself. I can lend my experience and trust behind the words of Allura Vysoren. The Kryn Dynasty of Xhorhas also seconds this recommendation."
TRAVIS: Damn.
MATT: "And we implore all of you present to do the same."
LAURA: I say we let them go! (laughter)
MARISHA: Please tell me that's Jester In the crowd. (laughter)
MATT: The light in the room shifts a bit and then eventually darkens within her staff. "Thank you." And she steps back to the side of the room. The Bright Queen nods to Keyleth. Keyleth, "(heavy exhale)"
LAURA: I'm so nervous.
MATT: Steps forward.
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: "(nervously) Conferring with our many allies--" (laughter)
ASHLEY: You got this girl.
MARISHA: Yeah. (laughs)
MATT: "-- and weeks of untangling the plots that hold our world in precarious turmoil, We have numerous corroborations defining Ludinus' plot to unleash the entity within the depths of Ruidus' core. To move with speed, our central strike team requires experience with Ruidus' topography, layout, culture, and ultimately, the plans of the Vanguard. We have universally agreed in our council upon one such team. They have directly survived multiple encounters with Ludinus and his conspirators, have allies on Ruidus willing to aid them, and have among them multiple Ruidusborn capable of pursuing him beyond boundaries few may be able to."
LAURA: Everyone look cool.
MATT: "We recommend Bells Hells to complete this final mission." The room still feels tense and silent.
MATT: There is--
ASHLEY: Woo! (laughter)
MATT: -- some curious glances--
TALIESIN: Thank you, Jester.
MATT: -- and some folks looking around the chamber for what and who that means.
MARISHA: Can I just Thaumaturgy a little wind, like we have a wind machine in front of us.
LAURA: Oh, yeah, yeah.
ASHLEY: Oh nice, nice.
MARISHA: So our hair--
LAURA: I'll give aid to that, because it only--
TALIESIN: That doesn't help me at all.
MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter)
MATT: Keyleth looks back to the rest of you and goes--
LAURA: Oh, yes.
MATT: And she steps back.
ASHLEY: We'll step forward.
MATT: The crowd moves around you a bit as you begin to approach--
ASHLEY: Excuse me.
LAURA: Sorry, excuse me.
MATT: -- acknowledging those who are present seeing you the night before as you step out into the chamber.
ASHLEY: Just get right by here.
MATT: It is absolutely still beyond the sound of your Thaumaturged wind--
LAURA: Excuse me. Excuse me.
MATT: -- and the echo of the footsteps across the marble floor.
ASHLEY: Sorry.
MATT: You can see once again every eye in this chamber upon you all, not any less than the massive silver dragon above that is also trained upon you. You all take the middle of this room, the faint warm sensation of the enchantment upon most of you, as the varying eyes of Exandria's leadership present await your words.
LIAM: Time is short.
SAM: And so am I.
MARISHA: You piece of--
TALIESIN: Trying to hold it in.
LIAM: There's a lot of halflings in this room, you guys. Be careful. Time is short. We've traveled the sands of Ruidus before and worked with many of its peoples. We mustn't delay. And it would be Bell Hells' honor to serve this chamber.
MATT: A figure you don't recognize from the side goes, "We know of many of the legends that have been spoken here, but you are still largely a mystery to us. I myself, and I'm certain many of us here, would like to have a little more information about what you bring to this beside having survived a dalliance on the moon." You can see the Highbearer raise a hand to calm the intensity a moment. At which point the High Curator Adona also steps forward and goes, "Yes, I also would be curious. How do we know that you have the best interests of Exandria's gods in mind? If you do indeed carry Ruidusborn among you, what assurances do we have that you are not yourselves deepset allies of Ludinus looking to unravel and carry upon everything we've discussed here to the enemy?"
ROBBIE: Dorian catches Ashton grinding his teeth and huffing in the corner and he sends a private message. And I said, I just say: Ash. Just for a few minutes, lock it up.
TALIESIN: Thank you. Just--
LAURA: Ludinus has caused great harm to all of us. Some very dear to us have been lost because of him and frankly, we hate him and would love the opportunity to bring him down.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
LAURA: Okay. 25.
TALIESIN: Ooh!
LIAM: (clears throat)
MATT: All right. The first figure that spoke up sits down while the High Curator, the Holy Curator, still keeps the standing position. "Are there any among you holy folk, pious? What gods do you worship? Which gods do you fight for? You stand in the holiest of spaces here in the eyes and sights of the creators of this realm to fight on their behalf, to save them from annihilation. And as such, our faith and powers, the very core of our civilization sits in your hands. Whom do you say your prayers to before you sleep at night?"
SAM: Please step forward.
LIAM: I pull up, you go.
LAURA: Oh, devious. (nervous noises)
ROBBIE: Not affected.
SAM: How fitting that we stand in the Platinum Sanctuary. The holiest of places that I've devoted my life to. It is a-- The tenets of the Platinum Dragon include:
MARISHA and MATT: (laugh)
SAM: Standing as a paragon of honor and justice. Fighting for the righteous. Stepping up for the weak. These are the ideals that Bells Hells wears proudly on our breast.
TRAVIS: Get them, Riegel!
SAM: I have traveled and known these fellows for many months.
MARISHA: (giggles)
SAM: And in that time, I have realized that it's not just our hatred of Ludinus that binds us together, but it's our individual strengths that sets us apart. We have among us the power of a Titan. We have the knowledge of the Ruidusborn. We have ones who are dedicated to family. We have one who has command over the dead itself. And we have a guy who makes chairs. (laughter)
SAM: We also have been smiled upon by the Prime Deities themselves. Why, even last night, our smallest warrior was visited.
LIAM: I pull out Seedling like the Sword of fucking Omens over my head and let vines travel up my arm and up the blade and then press it down into the steps below me. He speaks true. The Wildmother has blessed us here in this very city. The gods are watching. Take heed.
MATT: As you say, "The gods are watching," the golden gems that have since appeared upon the hilt (whooshes) give off a golden light around you, casting your shadow long against the marble and the whole room. You could hear the (gasps) of the awe around.
TRAVIS: ♪ (angelic singing) ♪
MATT: The Highbearer Vord stands up. First off, make a persuasion check on that.
LAURA: Persuasion or deception?
SAM: Maybe deception?
MATT: Well, although here's the thing. You didn't speak any untruths in that, necessarily.
LAURA: Well, except for the months.
LIAM: Except for the months.
SAM: You know what? It doesn't matter.
LAURA: He was traveling for months.
SAM: They're both the same number.
LAURA: Okay. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Come on, come on, baby.
LIAM: Give us some truth.
SAM: Oh, terrible.
LIAM: What is it? What is it?
SAM: You inspired me, right?
LAURA: Yes, yes. He did.
ROBBIE: No, I did not inspire you. I'm sorry. I'm a bad bard!
LIAM: What was it?
SAM: It was good. I rolled a two.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: Plus 14.
MATT: 16
SAM: 16.
ASHLEY: Okay.
SAM: Let me just check my spells.
ROBBIE: I'm so sorry.
MARISHA: Where did you pull off that Platinum Dragon shit?
TRAVIS: Plus.
LAURA: He wasn't.
ROBBIE: He wasn't. Yeah, that was his big backstory.
MATT: Okay.
SAM: Let me just check my--
ASHLEY: But that would be visible.
SAM: If I did a Gift of Gab, could I reroll?
ASHLEY: Gift of Gab?
TALIESIN: Ooh. Fancy pants.
LIAM: Every time I look at you--
ROBBIE: I'm sorry, I'm such a bad bard.
LIAM: -- tonight, I think I'm seeing Jason Mewes for a split second.
TALIESIN: It looks-- God, it's there, isn't it?
LIAM: Yeah, because you're doing this all the time.
MARISHA: Mother motherfucker.
MATT: It's within five feet of you.
TALIESIN: (laughs)
SAM: Oh shit.
MATT: Unfortunately, everyone's within hundreds of feet of you.
MATT: And further in the five feet. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Speak up. Can you speak up? What?
ASHLEY: Can't hear you.
MATT: All right. So, so.
ASHLEY: Close to the microphone!
SAM: It's not good.
LAURA: Not good.
MATT: It's not terrible.
SAM: He helped me.
MATT: He did. He did. And everyone completely is enamored with this display of holiness on Orym's part. And many, some folks seem to be interested. The Highbearer Vord, the very representative of the Platinum Dragon here in this space, steps forward. "You speak our tenets in our house. You yourself say you are a devout follower. I do not believe we've crossed paths. But if you are to represent the holiest of those in this house, I would like to know which of our sainthoods you represent."
SAM: Sainthoods?
MATT: "Which of the great saints of the Platinum Dragon do you walk the path of?"
SAM: Do I know what the fuck that means?
MATT: Make a religion check.
TALIESIN: What's the Platinum Dragon's mother's name?
LAURA: Okay, okay.
MARISHA and LAURA: (laughs)
ROBBIE: Yeah. What street did they grow up on?
SAM: That's a 22.
MATT: 22.
MATT: Yeah, you know a number of saints, you studied here. Make one up.
SAM: Oh.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
SAM: Uh-huh, uh-uh. A number of saints.
MARISHA: This is going in textbooks later on, so make it good.
SAM: Sure it is.
TRAVIS: Juniper The Wise. (laughter)
SAM: (clears throat) There have been so many saints.
LAURA and ASHLEY: (laughs)
SAM: So many devout in our hallowed history, that have made a lasting impression in my heart. But the one that stands out to me was The Fallen Saint. This, uh. Saint Graham.
LAURA: (giggles)
SAM: Saint Graham, who, as we all know.
ASHLEY: Graham?
SAM: Fell from the path, strayed from his worship of the Platinum Dragon and for many years was cast away. Until at the very end of his life, he realized his mistake and came back to the church, to the temple and dedicated the rest of his days to helping those who needed-- who needed just a little bit of guidance to the righteous path, those who had fallen like he had into the depths of despair and darkness. I feel like there are many on Ruidus and among us here on Exandria who have chosen the wrong path, but perhaps we can guide them back to the path of the righteous.
MATT: The Highbearer is nodding--
LIAM: That made sense!
MATT: As you're speaking-- (laughter)
ASHLEY: With your bovine features.
LAURA: In your head: Change your face.
SAM: Moo.
LAURA: Change your face. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Yeah.
MATT: As you were speaking, the Highbearer is stepping down the stairs from their perch, their seat, their throne, and is listening and looking at you and walking and inspecting you as you're saying this. And you've never met the Highbearer, but you are well aware who they are. They are the pinnacle of the Platinum Dragon's entire worship, a long-living paragon of his word and tenets. As they walk around you, looking at you, they approach. "Indeed. And you wish to represent our Lord in this great and holy mission. Do you see and find within your heart the strength to carry that joy and justice as your weapon, as your shield, as the very essence of his greatness, to protect them and protect us," as they place their hand on your symbol, on your chest that you've painted over.
SAM: Yes.
MATT: (laughs)
SAM: 'Til my dying day, Highbearer.
MATT: Roll a deception check.
TRAVIS: Come on baby.
MARISHA: Come on, come on. Bigger than a two.
LAURA: Okay.
ASHLEY: Okay.
SAM: (nervous laughs)
LIAM: What is it?
SAM: 20.
ASHLEY: 20 total.
MATT: 20.
MATT: Their eyes narrow at you a bit. They remove their hand and step silently back to their throne.
LAURA: Oh no. That did not succeed.
TRAVIS: Can you read his thoughts? Can you read his thoughts?
LAURA: I can't. I mean, I could try to Detect Thoughts on him, but I'm not going to do it in this environment.
ASHLEY: Yeah, I mean, they--
LAURA: Because they'll know if I'm casting a spell. I could Open up my Mind, though.
LIAM: This room is full of level 20s.
LAURA: Yeah, I'm just going to.
LIAM: Full of level 20s.
TRAVIS: Chicken shit. Do it.
LIAM and ROBBIE: (laughs)
LAURA: I Open my Mind.
TRAVIS: Yeah! (cheering)
ROBBIE: Oh, that works!
TRAVIS: That peer pressure!
MATT: Okay.
MATT: While the Highbearer is nearby.
LAURA: Yes.
MATT: Okay.
MATT: So you catch surface thoughts. Are you delving into their thoughts?
LAURA: I'm going to catch surface thoughts.
MATT: Okay.
MARISHA: (laughs)
SAM: Where the fuck was your inspiration, motherfucker.
ROBBIE: I'm so sorry!
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: What you catch is-- Well, the first thing you catch is a very well steeled will.
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: This is a mind that has forged itself through piety and responsibility to be very titanic fortress against any sort of influence. You catch just the faint bit of emotion as they pass beyond the boundary of your opened mind. And what you catch is, a difficult to place mistrust, just the seed of worry, and an intent to follow up when this conversation is done.
SAM: Gulp.
MATT: (laughs)
ASHLEY: It's all right, we'll save stuff.
MARISHA: We'll talk about it, yeah, yeah. yeah.
MATT: The Highbearer sits back down. At which point, the High Hierophant Ophera says--
LIAM and ROBBIE: (laughs)
MATT: "And as--" Hmm?
TRAVIS: Huff-huff-huff-huff
LAURA: Huff-huff-huff-huff.
MATT: Huff-huff-huff-huff.
LIAM: (laughs)
MATT: My god.
LIAM: That's not even from tonight or this room! (laughter)
MATT: "As we've seen, our great Mother is with us and we have the holiness of the Platinum Dragon amongst us. Yet there are dark magics put upon this. A necromantic bent that is sent to correspond with the light of holiness. Would you please assure us how can we expect and hope that you will stay on the path of the righteous as well?"
SAM: I promise?
MARISHA and SAM: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Pinky swear.
MARISHA: Death is still very much a part of life. And while some may balk at the necromantic arts, they are still a part of the greater magics blessed to us by the gods of Exandria via the Arch Heart and furthermore stewarded from the Matron of Ravens. When fighting such darkness, we have found it is often beneficial to have just a little bit of darkness on your side.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
MARISHA: Same Sam Riegel (grimaces). Please.
SAM: Don't make that face.
MARISHA: (laughs) Fix your face! Fix your face! Persuasion?
MATT: Yes.
MARISHA: (excited panting) Natural 20! (cheering)
TRAVIS: Shit! (cheering)
SAM: How is she better at this than me?
MARISHA: Mother! Mother! Motherfucker! Fuck.
MATT: (laughs)
LAURA: It would've been good for you to roll that.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah.
LIAM: Noice, noice, noice.
TALIESIN: I, for one, want to hear what the dry cadaver has to say. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Let its dusty voice be heard.
MATT and ASHLEY: (laughs)
MATT: As you say this, three figures stand from the side that were obscured from your vision in the shadows of the sunlight that's been cast through the far form and what bit of golden light sits in this chamber and the clusters of people. There was one element that almost seemed like your eyes didn't focus on and as these few figures stand, you see these black shrouded, veiled, robed figures. As they all stand in response to your statement, the room turns its attention. One of them steps forward. "The Coven of the Veil hears her words, and we know this to be true, for what does light do but cast a shadow? They are in tandem or should be. And it would be foolish to think one should exist without the other. It's about the balance and there is much light in this group. We are comforted that a shadow walks among them and in step."
MARISHA: As fire. I should have said that. That whole shadow and light?
LAURA: It's good to have them think about you like that.
MARISHA: Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I meant.
MATT: (laughs)
TRAVIS: Off the dome, Mercer, what the fuck?
MARISHA: I know. It's good.
MATT: The Highbearer, which is still locking eyes with Braius over there, quietly shoots a glance amongst the rest. "So there were words of a titan's power among you. The titans that were once opposed to the gods. Could somebody please elaborate with assurances that we are not sending ancient enemies to fight on our behalf?"
MARISHA: Play nice. Play nice.
TALIESIN: Psychically you hear: I am so sorry.
MARISHA: No, no, no, no, no.
LAURA: No, no, no, Ashton.
LAURA: Do not fuck us. Do not fuck us.
ASHLEY: I'll step forward, too.
MATT: Okay.
ROBBIE: Oh.
SAM: Let's go, Suicide Squad.
TRAVIS: That's true. That's true. That's true.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
LIAM: Let's go.
SAM: What?
TALIESIN: They would be talking about me.
MARISHA: And her.
TALIESIN: And honestly, I think this is a very, very bad time to decide who ancient enemies are right now. Everyone is threatened. Yes, and I'm sorry that I am not serving any god present here right now. And the fact that that is even a problem it is even a question right now? I find a little offensive. We are all here. I serve-- (sighs) I serve the weak. I serve the forgotten. I serve the dirt beneath our feet. If you tell me that that's not enough for you. Fine! I will fight on my own. Because honestly, the alternative sounds really fucking awful. Psychically I: Fuck, fuck. (laughter)
LAURA: That was great. That was actually really--
ASHLEY: That was good.
LAURA: Probably the best you've ever--
ASHLEY: That was really good.
TALIESIN: (laughs)
MATT: (laughs)
LIAM: (whispery noises)
MATT: Make a persuasion check. A persuasion check for me, but I will let you use your strength modifier.
LAURA: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
ASHLEY: Awesome, awesome, awesome. Yeah, that was awesome.
MATT: Since this represents a strength of character and presence behind it.
TALIESIN: And definitely. Yeah. Okay. So, technically that would be, I guess that's just my intimidation roll because that's strength based.
MATT: Now, I would say because you stepped up with him. Is there a way you would like to aid to this in this conversation--
TALIESIN: Please?
MATT: -- knowing how challenged Ashton can be in public speaking arrangements?
LAURA: (like Fearne) I just pull my tits out. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Well, I'll buy that.
ASHLEY: Just panic. (laughter)
TRAVIS: I believe him!
TALIESIN: Just one of them and lean right. One of them and lean right. They'll miss the whole thing. It'll be great.
ASHLEY: Um... Um... Um! Ah! (laughter)
LIAM: We're at death's door all the time.
TALIESIN: Quick, spin the bottle!
LIAM: Yeah, just leave them out.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah.
TRAVIS: ♪ Things are looking up ♪ (laughter)
ASHLEY: I'll just say: I, too, have a shard of a Titan, and I... I don't worship any one god, but I... I do believe that they all deserve to live. Even the bad ones.
SAM: (laughs)
ASHLEY: Just putting that out there.
MARISHA and SAM: (laughs)
ASHLEY: That's only my personal opinion. But. Yeah, we're pretty great. And we've already been to the moon, so I think you should pick us.
LAURA: (laughs)
SAM: (laughs)
MATT: Keyleth is looking at both like.
ASHLEY: Also, uh. I'm one of the--
SAM: Show them.
ASHLEY: Oh, oh, oh.
LIAM: Do the thing.
ASHLEY: But won't I get exhausted?
TALIESIN: Are we doing the thing? Let's do the thing. Fuck it.
LAURA: Just do it. Fucking flare it up!
ASHLEY: All right. All right.
TALIESIN: I'm going to... Let's show them what we offer. I'm going to rage. Oh, that's fun. That's one of my weird d4s. I love it.
TRAVIS: Pop rocks.
TALIESIN: Let's just pop rock. Wow. It's-- I'm so freaked out that I forgot what-- So the time bending power kicks in, so the weird little celestial star field that's now become the thing here. And then the hammer starts doing the red and blue shift, and then I'm going to grow and turn into the Titan form while this happens. And then I'm going to... I'm going to cast Acceleration Wave in the whole room.
MATT: Okay.
TALIESIN: To... the ten most interesting people in the room, including-- I'm going to get the two of us in here, too. But I'm going to--
MATT: All right. So as your body expands, the stones cracking and erupting, the volcanic arm lighting up at the seams with primal Titan power. Fearne, if you'd like to describe how you present your transformation within the chamber.
ASHLEY: Sure. I just see Ashton and look at Keyleth and nod and you'll just see sort of a ring of fire start to dance around Fearne and the Primordial flame Titan Rau'shan comes alive and just set aflame.
LAURA: Do you float up in the air?
MATT: Your hair drifts and lifts.
ASHLEY: Yeah, a little bit.
MATT: Flickering as you can glide and spin in the air with your transformation. The two of you becoming these two primal elements, dancing for a moment in the space. Time seems to shift and speed up and slow down and some members of the crowd around like, (breathy gasps) seem to be strangely affected or moved by the presence.
TALIESIN: Ten fun people get basically--
MATT: So it says "ten fun people get--"
TALIESIN: Well, it says ten creatures. So I'm just picking probably the people who are at the council I'm talking to maybe the dragon, if I'm feeling fancy.
MATT: Sure.
TALIESIN: Ah, yeah. They get that speed rush.
MATT: That burst. That magic bump. I would like you both-- (laughs)
TALIESIN: I hear it now.
MATT: I would like you both to make a-- Both of you make a persuasion check. The transformation does give you advantage.
TALIESIN: Oh god. I'm panicking. Yes! (grunts)
ASHLEY: Okay. Oh wow. That would be. Hold on. 32.
TALIESIN: Oh. Never mind.
MATT: All right. And?
TALIESIN: 26.
LAURA: Oh, that's so great for you.
TALIESIN: Yeah, it's so great.
MATT: That's great for you. Okay. As you both display this space here, there is a few glances of fear and confusion, but a number of like, "I'm witnessing something unique." As well, people nodding and drinking in the visuals of what's there. Both of you hear, "(low-pitched huffed laugh)" echo from the chamber above, and you glance up for just a moment to see the silver dragon smile and tilt its head a little bit also witnessing you both. You hear-- You hear a voice echo through your heads in the chamber that says, "Quite impressive." As you all settle in for a moment and join the rest of your friends, another figure from across the way, you recognize as Galtheid of the Ember Vigil. The mage of the Stratos Throne says, "And the chair maker." (laughter)
MATT: "And this well-dressed lad. What do you offer this strange motley crew?"
LAURA: That's you. Well-dressed guy.
ROBBIE: Huh?
MARISHA and LAURA: (laughs)
MATT: He's looking right at you.
ROBBIE: Oh, I just heard chair maker and sort of blanked out.
TRAVIS: I just figured beauty before age, but I can take it.
ROBBIE: Sorry. What was your question? A little. (laughter)
ROBBIE: I just, when I get around a lot of people, I start to-- (laughter)
ASHLEY: Your throat closes up.
ROBBIE: My core character trait.
MATT: Make a perception check.
ROBBIE: Perception?
MATT: Yeah. (laughter)
TALIESIN: It's math class. Calculus. Calculus.
MARISHA: Oh no!
MATT: Okay.
ROBBIE: Yeah, sure.
MARISHA: Buddy.
MATT: Your reaction. What is it?
ROBBIE: Three.
MATT: Three. Okay. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You're flustered by all this.
ROBBIE: I'm blinded by my own tears.
MATT: Yeah. (laughter)
TRAVIS: They're in triplicate.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: In your head you heard: Resume. Resume. Why are you here? What do you work? Where do they put-- what?
ROBBIE: Could you repeat the question?
TALIESIN: Goddamn it!
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: "What do you have to offer to this venture?"
ROBBIE: Oh. Well, you've made us all be honest. I'm not sure what I have to offer, but I know what my group has to offer. I see it all around us. We are you. Scaled down. We all saw you talking the other day and I'm no expert, but it seems to me that you couldn't decide what the right course of action was and just last evening, neither could we. But, ah. I don't think that means that you and we will not make the right choice. All of us come from different places, different backgrounds, and that's what gives us our strength. We may not be nobles or great religious powers, but we are simply people, capable people set to task. The task we've been set to will require one moment of clarity and morality. Though none of us might be capable of doing it ourselves, as I do not know that I am, I know that we are. So, if you have trust in this chamber, perhaps you could have trust in us, for we will do the right thing.
MATT: A voice rings from the side chamber as the Flamespeaker Cerkonos says, "A masterful deflection. But what is in your heart? What fire burns in your chest? What do you bring?"
ROBBIE: Wow. While Dorian was distracted for the last 10 minutes or so, there's been a tune in his head that he's been silently humming under his breath. It's something he does when he's nervous. He's never been able to place the tune, and the notes have never come together in the right way, except for right before this was asked. He hears something in the distance from outside of the chamber in that 10 minutes, and he accidentally casted a spell through this song, the spell of Find Greater Steed.
MATT: Mm.
ROBBIE: As it materializes through the walls of the chamber, it is a great equine dragon the size of a draw horse. When he sees it, he remembers the stories his mother used to tell him about this legendary mount from their family. And he remembers finally the song that she used to sing to him that haunted his dreams at the beginning of this journey. As he does, Coriolis, the great equine dragon, flies down and sits at his side and sort of nestles its head into his chest. He's as surprised as anyone. We may not look like much, but we have power and we are capable, and so am I. My heart desires to make a difference. I'll pet the steed on its head, slap it on its tail, and it leaves the chamber.
LIAM: Orym totally blue screens. (laughter)
TALIESIN: What the fuck was that?
LAURA: (error tone)
MATT: Roll a persuasion check.
ROBBIE: Oh! A persuasion.
LAURA: Yes!
LAURA: Okay, okay okay, okay.
ROBBIE: Okay. Let's see how it goes.
MATT: I will give you advantage on that for conjuring a fucking--
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah.
MATT: -- equine dragon from your familial history.
TRAVIS: That was cool.
TALIESIN: ♪ Spread your wings ♪
MATT: (laughs)
TALIESIN: ♪ Neon pegasus ♪
LIAM: Advantage for poetry.
SAM: Advantage.
LIAM: Advantage.
ROBBIE: Oh, advantage? Okay. The first one was better.
SAM: You also have--
LAURA: Inspiration.
SAM: -- inspiration if you need it.
ROBBIE: Okay. 26. 29.
MATT: Cerkonos, who was looking at you intently, at first it felt through you, but instead was just pushing you, relents and smiles and sits back into the crowd.
LAURA: That was fucking badass.
ASHLEY: That was so fucking cool.
TRAVIS: That was great.
ROBBIE: I am pitted outright now.
MARISHA: (laughs)
LAURA: I can see.
TRAVIS: Wonderful.
LAURA: But no, you were-- The dragon's awesome.
ASHLEY: No, no, no. Your shirt's mesh, so you can't really tell.
LAURA: You are powerful. You're great.
MATT: "Does the chair man have a dragon, too?"
TRAVIS: The chair maker, not chair man.
ASHLEY, LAURA, SAM, and MARISHA: (laugh)
TALIESIN: Chair boy.
TRAVIS: Master craftsman, if you would. C-POP Industries would like to thank the Dawn Marshalls of Vasselheim for their hospitality. Surely those of Wildemount know my creations, But Issylra could benefit from an upgrade.
MARISHA: (laughs)
TRAVIS: You ask what I bring. Fo' hundo! (400)
LAURA and SAM: (laugh)
TRAVIS: I am not a holy person. I don't share many of your beliefs, but I have walked Exandria for centuries. I remember Zan Tal'Dorei. I remember Errevon the Rimelord. I have seen the horrors that befall this land and how people are strong enough to rise up and rebuild. But what Ludinus is entertaining is unleashing a horror that predates any of that, any of us. And there's no telling where it could stop. The Pantheon, perhaps. But it could absolutely wipe the slate clean, and I will not let that stand as long as I draw a tiny, sexy breath. (snickering)
TRAVIS: So you ask what I give? Craftsmanship of which you can hardly imagine, but a wisdom that I think would rival any in this room and an unrelenting courage. I fear no man or creature. And I turn into a wolf. (laughter)
MATT: "Wolf?"
TALIESIN: Wait, you can do that?
TRAVIS: I could do it, but it just feels like a gross display of power, and it's not as cool as those two. I mean, fuck. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Have you been wearing-- I was hoping you were wearing the bloody bib through all this too, just leaving a trail of blood.
TRAVIS: No, I had to get rid of it.
TALIESIN: Yeah, that's right.
TRAVIS: I'm wearing my PJs. I'm sorry, that's more information than you asked for. But you're in good hands. And also, if I may. All the information that you have up to this point, all of these details, it's because of these faces, the risk that they endured, and the ones that we've lost. We've succeeded for you up to this point. Let us succeed for you more.
MATT: Make a persuasion check.
MARISHA: Let's fucking go.
LIAM: Let's go, chairman!
MARISHA: Let's go, come on chair man!
LIAM: Let's go, Chairman Pock O'Pea!
TRAVIS: Modifier zero. Modifier zero. 12.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: But it was so good!
LAURA: It was so good.
TRAVIS: That's all I got. That's all I got.
MATT: No, it was great.
TALIESIN: You should have looked up from your whittling, man.
LAURA: Does it change the DC depending on how well we talk?
MATT: It does.
LAURA: Okay. That's great, that's great.
LIAM: You think you're at a flea market?
MATT: Yeah, no. (laughter)
MATT: The the speeches change DC. DC is changed based on the speech and those listening and other factors that happen, and then things can also improve it or make it more challenging based on what's presented. But, no. As you all take a step back, Keyleth smiles and nods at the rest of you. The room awaits somebody to break the ice for a moment before Keyleth steps forward to the center of the chamber. "So. Lest anyone else seems to have more to prove, a better plot, and a stronger, more stalwart gathering of powers, minds, and hearts than what we've presented here, then these are your greatest hopes, even if just a few hopes of many. But these are the brightest hopes among them. Family bound to the memory of a fallen hero or two. Lend Bells Hells your trust and faith. Lady Fearne Calloway, Fey Scion of the Ancient Flame."
MARISHA: (gasps)
MATT: "Laudna, Veil Mistress of the Shadow Tree."
LAURA: (gasps) Oh shit.
MATT: "Ashton the Reforged, Hammer of Paradox."
ASHLEY: Ooh, ooh!
SAM: Whoa!
MATT: "Chetney Pock O'Pea, High Hunter and Lupine Paragon." (cheering)
TALIESIN: What is this?
MATT: "Dorian Storm, Master Muse and Son of the Wind." (impressed gasping)
MATT: "Imogen Temult, Exaltant Hope of the Red Storm."
ASHLEY: Ooh!
MATT: "Orym of the Air Ashari, Savior Blade of the Tempest," she says with a smile.
ROBBIE: Yeah!
MATT: "And Braius Doomseed, Nascent Might of the Platinum's Call."
ASHLEY: Ooh!
SAM: Okay, okay.
ROBBIE: That's good!
ASHLEY: Ooh!
TALIESIN: Not bad.
LIAM: Still truthful, too.
MATT: There's nods. And the nods catch through the crowd, and some side whispers and conversations begin to happen. You can hear the buzzing of conversations, the various members of the hierocracy making eyes at each other with curious looks, confirmation nods. The Highbearer stands from their throne perch.
PRODUCER: Ah! (giggles)
SAM: Ah! (laughter)
LIAM: Sorry, folks. A little off camera business overheard.
MATT: "There are many plans to be made, and not much time. Perhaps there will be changes, alterations, adaptations. But I feel confident in putting this forward for now, for indeed, it is the best we have. Does anyone present challenge this plot put forth and these volunteered champions of our cause?" Eyes shoot around the room. You see uncomfortable adjustments. You see people looking at each other. "Very well."
TRAVIS: Yo, yo!
MATT: "Then--"
ASHLEY: Oh my god, you guys. Say that in the head.
TALIESIN: Cowards. No.
MATT: The Highbearer looks down towards all of you, Keyleth, Vex'ahlia, Allura, Groon. "For now, you are our greatest hope. Carry that weight, carry that hope, and carry that strength with you. You have what you need, and all that we have to give behind you. Gather the rest you need. We'll put out word. The armies will be set. War plans will be made. In the week to come, we set the stage to assault the Moon of Ill Omen and end this once and for all." With that, the room just starts clapping. (slow-starting applause)
MATT: Cheers begin to build up.
LAURA: Wait, wait, no. Don't clap. You guys don't clap.
MATT: Some gentle, some loud, some just an odd acknowledgement of being in a moment of history. But nevertheless, the energy is palpable, and for the first time since you've arrived here, relatively unified. Even those that are keeping resolute and stoic in the face of this, you do not sense a strong feeling of doubt, regret, resentment. In this beautiful, crystalline moment, the scattered, chaotic minds and people of Exandria have come together. And they've come together behind legends. They've come together behind history. They've come together behind you. As the room begins to break away and scatter a bit, people begin to come up and start shaking your hands, start asking questions, start inquiring in how they can better serve what you need in the days ahead. It's overwhelming and challenged at bits. A young, I say young compared to you, gnome with tanned skin and a blonde pompadour wearing the raiments of the Platinum Dragon steps aside and goes, "Chetney? Chetney Pock O'Pea?"
TRAVIS: (hesitantly) Yes?
MATT: "I've been waiting for this moment for so long." As we turn to you, looking through this crowd--
TALIESIN: You're about to get served.
SAM: What? (laughter)
SAM: Papa?
MATT: As people--
MARISHA: Your ears are getting red.
ROBBIE: DNA test. (laughter)
MATT: As people are shaking your hands, a voice rings behind you to the right of your ear. "Brontë."
ASHLEY: (gasps)
ROBBIE: Hello, Father. I turn to meet what I assume is...
MATT: There stands before you, Zeru Wyvernwind, his salt and pepper long hair pulled back, his beautiful princely adornments, his clothing almost a regal echo to your battle vestments. His stern, if somewhat sad and surprised expression meets yours. And we're going to go to break.
TRAVIS: Oh!
TALIESIN: Oh!
TRAVIS: Oh, this is the best first half of the game ever!
TALIESIN: What's happening?!
TRAVIS: So good!
ROBBIE: (laughs)
MARISHA: Oh my god!
TRAVIS: Oh, this is the best first half of the game ever!
TALIESIN: Way more than I was ready for.
MARISHA: Everyone's speeches!
TRAVIS: Oh!
MARISHA: That's so good.
MATT: That was really cool.
ASHLEY: ♪ You're our last hope ♪
MATT: All right. We'll be back here in a few minutes. We'll see you shortly.
LAURA: Holy--
Break
(mysterious music)
XEN: It doesn't occur to any of you that the moon is about to fall out of the sky. And why would it? It's just a regular Monday here on the moon. Goe is watching the gigantic wall of darkness inbound. This isn't going to have transformative, long-lasting, incredibly far-reaching consequences, is it? Unfortunately, it will. We have gathered together a small squad of unlikely chums to seek what perhaps cannot be found. SARA: This is feeling really weird, really fast. XEN: I think it's time to go. All aboard. What could possibly go wrong? Such as, for example, the moon literally exploding literally right now.
LIAM: What's in it for you? Helping us...
MATT: If there is even the remotest chance that they are still alive, I have to see that through.
MARISHA: It's not about knowing or not knowing. It's about being willing to find out.
(peaceful music) (music builds) (adventurous music)
You fought well, princesses. But you didn't think winning the throne was gonna be that easy. Did you? [laughter] No, no, no. Midnight draws on. But this battle is just getting started. [laughter] I can't wait to see how this turns out.
LAURA: Hey Critters! Laura Bailey here to guide you through what's new in the Critical Role shop. Ooo so comfy cozy. You need this? You probably need this. Style should never be a dump stat, darling. Roll an investigation if you want. It's basically perfect. Look at this. Isn't it fashion? So much fashion happening here. I mean the Traveler always says, impulse purchases are a good decision. This is pretty badass. This is, this is a lot of stuff you guys. We have like so many cool things right now. And hey if you want, you could head over to the Critical Role shop right now.
(spooky music) (tavern music) (ominous music) (epic music) (mischievous music) (typewriter clacking) (peaceful music)
TRAVIS: Move the rook to B6.
MARISHA: Okay, see if that opens it.
LAURA: I'm trying it. [clicks] (gasping) [metal clattering] (cheering)
MARISHA: Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. Wait, it's blank. There's nothing in here. What the hell?
TALIESIN: The phonograph said that the answer would be in the journal.
TRAVIS: Oh, maybe we missed something, like some clue we're not thinking of!
LAURA: Ah, we only have four minutes left!
MARISHA: Okay, okay, think.
TALIESIN: Okay. The song said, "Look to the beacon." Look to the--
MARISHA: Right. Beacon. Light.
MARISHA and LAURA: (gasp) The lightroom!
LAURA: Get it out.
MARISHA: Okay.
TALIESIN: Oh, uh!
MARISHA: Uh-huh.
TALIESIN: The cryptex!
LAURA and MARISHA: (scream)
TALIESIN: The key is in the cryptex!
LAURA and MARISHA: We know!
LAURA: So if every other letter--
MARISHA: Times two.
LAURA: -- is the combination--
TRAVIS: Did you say times? Times, like a clock. It's in the clock! But how do you open it?
LAURA: (uncertain noise)
MARISHA: Okay. What is it?
LAURA: Okay, it's six.
MARISHA: Okay.
LAURA: Two. Four.
MARISHA: Yeah.
TRAVIS: 624? It's 6:24!
LAURA: Uh. Zero. [unlocking]
MARISHA: (gasp)
LAURA and MARISHA: (excited noise)
TALIESIN: Guys, guys, I think I found it!
TRAVIS: But it's not opening!
TALIESIN: So how do you unlock this?
MARISHA: That's not the cryptex. This is a cryptex.
TALIESIN: Wait, I think if I push my fingers into... No, that's not working.
MARISHA: We just need the code word. What's a six-letter code?
TRAVIS: I think it's jammed!
LAURA: Arlo said that in order to find the answer we need, we have to look to the beacon.
MARISHA: Uh-huh. Right. But Colonel Popcorn's telegram says--
TRAVIS: (grunts) [clattering]
MARISHA: "Be Aware -(STOP)- Exciting New -(STOP)- Amazing -(STOP)- Critical Role Content Available at Beacon.tv. -(STOP)- Oh my god. No Idea How to Finish this Fake Telegram -(STOP)-"
TRAVIS: Reveal your secrets to me!
TALIESIN: Can either of you help me, help me with the--
MARISHA: That's not a cryptex!
TALIESIN: I am very aware. (groans)
LAURA: Okay. What about this? Huh? Um, it says, "Try using Beacon." [shattering]
TALIESIN: Hey, Travis. Could you help with the--
TRAVIS: Not now, dude, I'm trying to save us! We've only got 90 seconds left! [slamming]
TRAVIS: (shrieks)
LAURA: "10% off merchandise. Members-only Discord. Exclusive new series." Is that a clue?
MARISHA: I don't know, it just feels too obvious, like something that a lazy writer would try and shoehorn into a script.
TRAVIS: (shrieks)
LAURA: Well, that would also explain this.
MARISHA: I know. That's useless.
LAURA: Literally no one says "literally" anymore.
MARISHA: Exactly.
TRAVIS: We're running out of time, people! Come on!
MARISHA: Uh. Okay, we just need a six-letter word that unlocks this artifact and also unlocks amazing content!
LAURA: Also, would it kill you to try to help us, Ashley?
ASHLEY: What do you think I'm doing? While you all are busy sucking eggs in La La Land, I was making an improvised munitions charge that'll blow this door off with minimal loss of life and hearing.
LAURA: You don't explode a door, Ashley! That's not how an escape room works!
ASHLEY: Oh, really? Because that is literally what this is, an escape room.
LAURA: She just said "literally."
MARISHA: "Literally."
TRAVIS: 30 seconds!
TALIESIN: Help! It's again!
ASHLEY: Fire in the hole!
LAURA and MARISHA: (scream) [lever slams] [alarm buzzes] [door clacks]
KYLE: Hey, guys. Uh, good job or not, I guess. Tried your best.
LAURA: Did we do it? Did we escape?
KYLE: No. No, no, you didn't.
TRAVIS: Oh, so close.
MARISHA: It was the stupid cryptex. The code word was too hard.
LAURA: It was impossible!
KYLE: Was it?
MARISHA and LAURA: Yeah!
KYLE: What was the name of the detective?
LAURA: Detective Beacon.
KYLE: Yeah, it was Beacon. Yeah? And where did the murder take place?
MARISHA: Beacon Street.
KYLE: Yeah, yeah. And what was the name of the law firm that hired Detective Beacon to exonerate the Beacon State graduate from the murder on Beacon Street?
MARISHA: Beacon, Beacon, and Associates.
LAURA: And Associates.
TRAVIS: So what was the code word?
KYLE: It's Beacon! It's Beacon!
LAURA and MARISHA: Oh.
KYLE: Yep, see? Here's the room key and here is all the cool new info about Beacon, our new membership program that offers discounts, early access to the Critical Role podcast, and new content like "Critical Role Abridged" and "Re-Slayer's Take," along with exclusive content like "Fireside Chats," "The Crit Role Cooldown," and many more to come.
TRAVIS: So how do you get into the clock?
KYLE: You don't! That's just a clock!
TALIESIN: Kyle.
KYLE: What...
TALIESIN: I have a problem.
KYLE: What did you do? Those weren't even here for the escape room. Where did you even get those? (sighs) ♪ (gentle, upbeat music ♪ "Hello Bees") ♪
THE BEE KINGS: ♪ Hello Bees, it's me again ♪ ♪ Look to the Beacon, ♪ my old friend ♪
Part II
MATT: And welcome back. So, jumping back in amongst the crowded exodus from the Platinum Dragon Sanctuary here atop the Heaven's Stair Mountain in the Silver Talon's Reach. Amongst the chaos, Dorian Storm has turned to see the sight of his father, the first time in some time. "Brontë, you look well, son."
ROBBIE: Oh, thank you. As do you, I, I suspected you might be here.
MATT: "I had no expectations of running into you here, let alone stepping up to such a monumental task."
ROBBIE: Oh, yes. Well, it seems as if I've left home to shirk my responsibilities and much greater ones have found their way to me.
MATT: "Certainly shirked the name, Dorian Storm."
ROBBIE: (laughs) Well, I'm not so certain that when you took, when you took your sabbatical as a youth, you kept your name, your proper name in the world.
MATT: "I don't begrudge you discovering yourself. It is your nature."
ROBBIE: Thank you.
MATT: "Word of Cyrus' passing has reached us. We've not yet found the time to properly mourn. I wanted to ensure that you were aware."
ROBBIE: I've been wondering if I should send word. There may still be hope, but I have very little. It's best--
MATT: "Well."
ROBBIE: Is Mother here?
MATT: "No, just I. She's back with the Squall, handling things while I represent here on an invitation from the Ashari. We have, as you know, quite historical tethers with Zephrah."
ROBBIE: It's kind of awkward, isn't it?
MATT: He just looks at you for a second, like that fatherly gaze into his son's eyes where he's sizing up at what stage of development he's been, a gaze you're familiar with. You see just the peek of tears gather at the side of his eyes as he comes forward and takes you into a hug.
ROBBIE: I think at first I lock up, as I tend to do with really physical affection of any kind. But yeah, even though I feel strong, I start to-- The embrace of a parent will always revert you back to your youth. And even though we almost see eye to eye, I just collapse into him like a little boy and start to cry.
MATT: You both break into each other for a moment and let many wordless emotions wash over you both. As he's holding you in his hands, on your shoulder, he says in your ear, he says, "You've been lost to the world's rumors for ages, son. We've been trying to find you for some time, especially given the events of late. We've missed you so much."
ROBBIE: I miss you, too. I set him aside and straighten up and steel up the way that I do. Are things managed at home?
MATT: "They are best as they can be in the ways of this current time. People are worried and scared."
ROBBIE: As they should be.
MATT: "Brontë, this is a monumental undertaking, a risk beyond words. There is no shame in returning home to us, leaving this to those capable--"
ROBBIE: No, no!
MATT: "-- and willing. The Silken Squall could use a returning son. Our heir to the Squall's golden seat."
ROBBIE: (short laugh) No. I will not abandon this task. I love you, I love our home. But I can do this. I can do this. Do you believe that I can do this with the help of my friends? That I can help them. Do you believe in me, Father? Do you believe in me? That's all I've ever wanted. Do you believe in me, Father? Is it so hard? Why do you pause? Why do you pause? The people that spoke out with me today did not pause. And I honor you, but I also question you. It was always him growing up and he is gone and I am sorry. And it was not my fault, it was his choice. But I have a chance to matter, to help others. And all I need is to hear it just once. I know you love me. You have always loved me, but you have never trusted me. One time, without hesitation, your only chance. Do you think I can do this?
MATT: "It's not a question of whether or not I think you can do this. I hesitate, not because of any lack of faith. Yes. I... and your mother are gifted, burdened living with the responsibilities of guiding our people. But underneath that all, we are a father and a mother. And we don't want to lose another son. So do I hesitate? Yes, but only because I'm scared. Because I believe in you. Because I can't nor will stop you. And because I know I have to believe that you can do what needs to be done. I just want you to promise that you'll return."
ROBBIE: Is-- Is that Zone Of Truth still up theoretically?
TALIESIN: I think you beat it anyway.
ROBBIE: Yeah. I just want to know if it still exists. Or if it was visibly dropped.
MATT: Oh, it's the entire temple, yeah.
ROBBIE: It's the whole temple? But no one knows whether or not who is affected?
MATT: Correct. If you want to roll an insight check to gauge his demeanor.
LIAM: Just for the painting, too, is this people are passing by?
MATT: Yeah, people are passing by, the whole chamber is still slowly exiting and conversing. But in this moment, it's all just a buzz of slow moving noise and just the two of them in the middle.
ROBBIE: I promise. I will come home.
MATT: "Good."
ROBBIE: And I reach out to just shake his hand. Nothing ceremonial, just a father shaking his son's hand.
MATT: He shakes it and clasps it with his other. "If you must make this journey, remain ever vigilant. Step no further than safety will allow. Heroism is a game for those without standing legacy. Lean on those you can trust."
ROBBIE: I understand. I better return to my group. We have much planning.
MATT: "Of course, of course. It's good to see you."
ROBBIE: It was good to see you, too. I'll break away and try to--
TALIESIN: I am not far away. I have been mildly--
MATT: You take two steps and he goes--
TALIESIN: -- quietly, listening in.
MATT: "Wait. Here," and he unbuckles the ceremonial blade at his side.
ROBBIE: Papa. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Papa!
LIAM: ♪ Oh, mine. Papa ♪
MATT: "Take this. It is the symbol of our family, and is sworn to protect our people for many generations. It will continue to protect us and many more in your hands." Then he holds out to you what you know to be Gambolcleft, the Vortex Blade.
TRAVIS: Oh! Let's go, Gambolcleft!
ROBBIE: Okay.
MATT: This is the symbol of leadership within the Silken Squall community and has bound within it an ancient wind spirit that gave itself to eternal protection over the people that you one day will inherit.
LAURA: He who rides a dragon and is accompanied by a wind spirit.
TALIESIN: It's actually--
ROBBIE: Give me that thing.
ASHLEY: Dang! Look at that.
TALIESIN: It's the story that connects me to my wind spirit who lives in Canada. (laughter)
ROBBIE: No one's ever seen it.
TALIESIN: No one's ever seen it.
ROBBIE: Totally there.
TALIESIN: She lives in the sword.
ROBBIE: (gasps) Whoa!
TALIESIN: Damn!
ROBBIE: Holy smokes!
MATT: It's a beautiful curved silver shortsword that has engraved within it gold etchings and filigree all throughout, these beautiful runes that flow like wind. But within them, if you look closely, you can see language, magical runic language, even just pulling it free from its sheath as you hold it, it's near weightless in your hand. In either hand.
ROBBIE: Oh. Thank you. I assume this is on loan, and I look for a spot to clip it on my belt and don't have one because Typhonus, the Gambler's Blade is right here. And I unclip it and I go: Here, a drunk old man who died while pissing gave this to me. (laughter)
MATT: He takes and goes--
ROBBIE: It's pretty, right?
MATT: "I will keep it safe."
ASHLEY: It's sacred.
ROBBIE: It's decorative.
MATT: "Are you sure?"
ROBBIE: I'll come back for it.
MARISHA: Wow.
MATT: And he affixes it to his belt.
TRAVIS: (quietly) How could you? (laughter)
ROBBIE: Hear in the wind. (laughter)
TRAVIS: (ghostly whisper) I see you.
ROBBIE: All right.
MATT: Seeing the blade at your side as he steps back a bit.
MARISHA: Wow.
MATT: Looks at you. A smile and a look in his eyes that you've been chasing your entire life Pride. And with that, he just nods and joins the crowd.
TRAVIS: Jeez.
LAURA: He wasn't the only one that succeeded against that Zone of Truth.
TALIESIN: In your head you: I cannot believe you gave him the sword. Ugh. We could have boiled that for something.
MARISHA: Sucked it in.
ROBBIE: I cannot leave my father unarmed at the end of the world.
TRAVIS: It's true.
ASHLEY: How are you doing?
ROBBIE: For the first time in a while, quite well.
TALIESIN: Look at him.
ASHLEY: He looked like he was really proud of you.
ROBBIE: Well, that's yet to be proven. Because if we fuck this up, I am so still an asshole. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Who'll be left to know?
ROBBIE: Great point.
MATT: As we shift attention back over to this conversation.
TRAVIS: Oh, yeah.
ASHLEY: Oh shit.
LAURA: Papa.
MATT: "I've been waiting so long for that. C-Pop Industries? Chetney Pock O' Pea?"
TRAVIS: That's right.
MATT: "I don't know how to-- I've run this through my head so many times. I don't think I was ever have the chance. I am such an admirer of your work. I have been following it for decades now. All of my furniture pieces I've collected over the years. Distant collectors and various auction houses. I have been piecing together the interior of my abode based on pretty much only things that you've made. I've gathered toys and gifted them to children throughout the entire neighborhood here. You are a master."
TRAVIS: I just reach out and hug him.
MATT: "(yelps)" (laughter)
TALIESIN: Are you still--
LAURA: No.
TALIESIN: Okay. Okay. Damn.
TRAVIS: I know it's hard to keep your composure. I have interactions like this all the time.
MATT: "I'm sure. I'm sure. Yeah."
LAURA: Did he say "have erections"?
MARISHA: Erections?
LIAM: I heard it, too.
TRAVIS: What's your name?
MATT: "My name is Waylon. S-s-scalebearer Waylon Amaredda. I've been one of the Scalebearer aides here for some time. I just never thought I'd see someone like you walk into our humble walls."
TRAVIS: Well, you never know what can happen in Vasselheim. I always say legends in these halls, myself included.
MATT: "Well, I don't know how long you're staying in town, given, you know, all that's going on, but if you ever have some time, I'd love to show you what I've done with the place. And it's practically a museum in your honor."
TRAVIS: We are very, very busy. Obviously. Lots of meetings. Lots of secret things.
MATT: "Of course, of course I expected. So foolish of me to ever even suggest--"
TRAVIS: I'd have to check and make sure that you have the proper security clearances. But if you insist, I suppose I could grant a single wish and, you know, peruse my old collections, I suppose. I'm sure I could break away for a moment, right?
LAURA: Oh, I don't think we can risk it, Chet.
ASHLEY: You're a big fan. What was your name?
TRAVIS: This is Waylon the Wise.
ASHLEY: Waylon The Wise?
LAURA: Hi, Waylon.
ASHLEY: Wow!
MATT: "Hi. Pleasure to meet you all. Wow. I don't think you understand the scope of the majesty that you've been walking alongside this entire time. But there are dozens of us Exandria-wide who we send each other letters, we give updates. We--"
TRAVIS: What do you mean? There are more of you?
MATT: "We're the C-Poppers. We have a whole fan club that we've been developing."
TALIESIN: I hate all of this!
MATT: "I've been working on a zine for the past few years."
LAURA: Wait, is the Zone of Truth still up?
MATT: Yes.
LAURA: Ah ha!
TRAVIS: The C-Poppers?
MATT: "We can change it, if you don't like it. With your input, we could really bolster the community."
TRAVIS: I think it's wonderful.
MATT: "Can I tell them that we met?"
TALIESIN: Thank you.
TRAVIS: Absolutely. Yes. You--
MATT: "You know what? Actually, I know a painter. Can I get a painty?" (laughter)
MATT: "That's too much. I'm overreaching. I'm sorry. You're busy. You don't have a lot of time."
TRAVIS: No, no. None of us know how long we have. A painty would be fine.
TALIESIN: I--
MATT: "I'm sorry."
TRAVIS: You know what? Because we're so busy. It would be better if you worked with my assistant to schedule these things. (snapping) Imogen! Imogen! Oh, there you are. This is Waylon. Waylon is a devotee.
MATT: "Hi. Waylon. Absolute pleasure to meet you."
LAURA: You as well.
TRAVIS: I know we get lots of inbounds from the C-Poppers, but if you could move this one to the top of the pile.
LAURA: I thought we weren't allowed to lie right now, Chet? In your head, you hear.
TRAVIS: (mumbling) (laughter)
MATT: What's funny is at this point, you've left, and he's just crossed the threshold.
TRAVIS: (joyous, braggadocious noises)
LAURA: All right, all right, all right.
TRAVIS: If you could help me just arrange that in our time here, I'm sure Waylon would be most appreciative.
LAURA: Sure, Waylon. I'll just send you a little message when we're going to head over, all right?
MATT: "Oh, wonderful, wonderful. I look forward to it. Imogen?"
LAURA: I was in the same room as everyone else. You know I'm Exalted--
MATT: "Oh, that was you!"
LAURA: What is my fucking title? I'm the Hope of the Red Storm.
MATT: "Of course. I am so sorry. Wow. I'm just very focused."
LAURA: No, yeah, I know, I know. He's great. We'll let you know.
TRAVIS: I'll talk to her, it's okay.
MATT: "Oh, anyway, I get-- Oh! Yes, Highbearer. Pleasure."
TRAVIS: Vord?
MATT: And Vord is stepping up.
SAM: As I see her approach. I'm just going to reach into my pouch surreptitiously and there's a piece of metal in there, and I'm going to break it with my hand. That's it.
MATT: Okay. (Vord) "I don't know about you. You wear the skin of our people. How do I know that you won't burn our trust down?"
SAM: Highbearer, let me guess. You have suspicions of me. Even, even now. Even through a Zone of Truth. Even through all of our words of assurance. That's possibly because I lied to you. I was a faithful acolyte of the Platinum Dragon, but I was, I brought shame to my post, and I was sent away. I know you're familiar with the Platinum House in Zadash.
MATT: "Indeed."
SAM: And the overseer there, Marlow?
MATT: "Mm-hmm."
SAM: Well, I failed in my post many years ago. I pull out an old, rusty Platinum Dragon symbol around a chain. And I show it to the Highbearer and say: He broke this and sent me packing. Said I was not worthy of wearing this. But I've kept it. And I've hoped in all this time that I could somehow earn the right to glue these pieces back together and earn the trust of the Platinum Sanctuary once more. I'm sorry that I misled you.
MATT: Highbearer's nostrils flare with a piercing gaze as a voice to the right goes, "There are few things as wonderful in this world as chance at redemption."
SAM: Oh! Pikey!
MATT: "Trust me, I would know." As Pike Trickfoot stands there, holding forth the symbol of the Everlight. (adoring, pleased noises)
ASHLEY: Tuh-woo! (True)
TRAVIS: (Grog) Listen to her!
LIAM: Wow!
MATT: The Highbearer glances down with the symbol up towards Vord. Pike smiles. "Historically, some of the most faithful saints, pious, loving leaders of this temple once fell from their perch, tumbled from their grace, and without a chance would they have ever had the opportunity to become the greatness that you still carry, Bearer?" Make a persuasion check with advantage with Pike's help.
SAM: Thank you, Pike.
LAURA: Thank you, Pikey.
TALIESIN: Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.
LAURA: Okay, with advantage?
TALIESIN: Okay, okay.
SAM: Oh. That's cocked.
ASHLEY: Ooh!
SAM: I can't read this new one.
LAURA: That's 18.
SAM: That's 18?
ASHLEY: That's an 18.
SAM: Okay. 32.
ASHLEY: Ooh!
MATT: Okay.
LIAM: Okay.
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: At a DC 30. It's the fucking Highbearer of the Platinum Sanctuary.
TRAVIS: 100%.
MATT: What do you think?! (laughter)
TRAVIS: Uh-huh. 32.
MATT: (Vord) "Mm. Perhaps you are right, Miss Trickfoot. Too much is at stake here." You see the eyes glance down at the symbol that you've painted and back up at you, and you can acknowledge in their expression that there is or are facets of your... persona seen through. They're letting you know with their eyes that in some small way, they might acknowledge some truth you don't want them to. But then they smile. "But paths to redemption can be quite powerful symbols of faith for those that need a way to the light. Well, Braius Doomseed. If you are to represent our great dragon, you need armor that truly bears their symbol. As they put their hand out and wipe the paint from the chest plate.
SAM: Okay. Okay. As they turn around, you can see there are two Scalebearer aides that are approaching with a massive platinum chest.
ROBBIE: Whoa!
TALIESIN: Rough couple of days, man.
SAM: Fuck.
LIAM: Let's go, Bullshit King.
ROBBIE: ♪ Asmodeus! ♪ (laughter)
TRAVIS: ♪ Beelzebub! ♪
SAM: I'll kill you when you sleep. (laughter)
MATT: As the Highbearer raises their hand and the chest is lifted open, you see, there's-- It's a heavy weight on this. And as they open it up and inside, the light catches a beautiful, intricate set of silvered platinum platemail. "This is Truthbearer."
SAM: Oh shit! (laughter)
TALIESIN: You're getting called out.
ROBBIE: Oh man!
TRAVIS: Fucking Truthbearer!
MATT: "The fabled plate of Uther Vendrock."
MARISHA: Jeez!
MATT: "The Silvered Star, one of the kindest and most noble warriors of the Platinum Dragon. You should well be acquainted with their history."
SAM: Am I?
MATT: Roll a history check or religion, your call.
LIAM: Is it part of the old religion?
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM: Would he get advanty on that?
TRAVIS: Truthbringer or Truthbearer?
MATT: Well-- Hmm? Truthbearer.
TRAVIS: Truthbringer or Truthbearer?
TRAVIS: Yeah.
SAM: Okay.
TRAVIS: Wow.
SAM: It's 23.
MATT: You very much know who this is. They lived between, it's estimated like, like 500 to 575 PD. They were like a cherished guardian of the downtrodden. They were a hero to those without light. They carved a legacy in the annals of Exandrian history through their deeds and charity and heroism. When their soul finally passed into the Platinum Dragon's embrace, this armor was kept as a symbol of hope and protection within the Sanctuary. "May it protect you on your path to redemption," and they present the armor to you, the two, as the Scalebearers begin to take them out and essentially help remove your armor and place it upon you in a sudden ceremony here on the steps, as the Highbearer just watches you the entire time.
SAM: I'll keep my eyes locked with theirs. And just try to take in the honor and the sanctity of the moment.
MATT: (heavy armor placement) Heavy bracers and gauntlets placed on massive multi-plated shoulder pauldrons that spike off to the sides. Beautiful plate, and a helm that is multi-hinged so it can fit over multiple heads and they pull back to and dislodge sections to allow your horns to curve out the sides.
TALIESIN: He made the gift of a holy relic like an epic burn. How?
MATT: Finally affixing with this massive, beautiful black and silver lined cape. It is just a jet black with a silver edge and the platinum light still matches your colors. (impressed noises)
MATT: As it sits upon you. "It's a fine fit. Do us proud, Doomseed."
SAM: I will make it fit even better in my deeds.
MATT: And they walk away.
SAM: (high-pitched whine)
MARISHA: And I walk away.
LAURA: Wow!
ASHLEY: Sir!
TRAVIS: I could see my reflection in your ass. This is amazing.
LAURA: How's it feel?
SAM: Pretty good, actually. How does it look?
ASHLEY: Great! You might be like your-- Turn out to be like your favorite saint, Graham, who fell away.
SAM: Yes, and was redeemed.
ASHLEY: Came back to the--
LAURA: Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
ASHLEY: -- Platinum Dragon.
SAM: You know what? I, I hadn't planned on that, but maybe this is a sign.
LAURA: Insight check.
ROBBIE and MATT: (laugh)
SAM: Okay.
MATT: All right. So you roll persuasion or deception, your choice without having to say which.
TALIESIN: I don't believe it isn't butter.
LAURA: Oh shit.
SAM: Natural 20. (laughter)
LAURA: I believe you.
TRAVIS: 30.
LAURA: Wow.
TRAVIS: Oh! (clamoring)
LIAM: All the long papers.
LAURA: Oh my gosh!
SAM: Oh my god. Uther--
TRAVIS: Holy shit.
MARISHA: Wait, why is it's more orange in color? Is it just because your printer ran out of ink?
LAURA: Is it exalted?
MATT: No. It's because the printer here didn't have enough orange. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Oh, why is your color stronger?
LIAM: What is this color on Monopoly? That's--
LAURA: That's right. What's the one?
SAM: Marvin Gardens?
TALIESIN: Marvin Gardens, I think, yeah.
ASHLEY: Boardwalk.
TRAVIS: Hey, Waylon!
MATT: "Yeah?"
TRAVIS: I reach into the bag of holding and take out one of my--
MATT: He's, like, carrying part of the chest.
TRAVIS: -- one of my small wooden coins that has C-POP.
MATT: "I'm so sorry. Give me just a minute." Runs off as the other person is like, "(startled grunt)" having to carry most of the weight.
TRAVIS: It'll be hard not to tell the others, but this is a limited run. Take care of it.
MATT: "(surprised noise) I will cherish it with my life."
TRAVIS: I know.
MARISHA: Laudna glides over and starts inserting herself into this conversation: Hi. Hello. I just, you know, Chet, I don't, you know.
TRAVIS: Yes.
MARISHA: I know we're so busy, but I feel like it would be a missed opportunity to not go and see his very elaborate abode. I personally want to see all of your fine works. Genuinely, I, I need this. I don't know if you need this, but I need this.
TRAVIS: Well, if you insist. I've certainly seen them all before, but it can only make your life richer.
MATT: "Sure, you're welcome to come along as well. Of course, as a friend of the Master Artisan."
MARISHA: Can we all go? Do you have snacks?
MATT: "I-- give me some time, I have to-- I have some duties to get to and I'm waiting on a word from his assistant to let me know when--"
LAURA: I'll send him a little message.
ASHLEY: I'd love to go, too. I really want to see--
MATT: "Okay, it's--"
ASHLEY: -- your whole line of work.
MATT: "It's a humble place. It's not quite the scale, but I think, I think everyone there could fit who wants to, within 10 people, max. But yeah, just have your assistant let me know when you're ready. I'm going to go and finish my work."
LAURA: (mumbles)
TALIESIN: He's not going to be humble for long.
TRAVIS: Easy, assistant. I know it's a little high pressure of the day. Thank you.
MATT: "Thank you." Puts it back inside his chest pocket and runs over and grabs the edge of the chest and helps them carry it back into the Sanctuary.
TRAVIS: Bidet.
TALIESIN: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
LIAM: Before we move forward, Orym's not here. Can I add a quick thread?
MATT: Sure.
LIAM: Okay. Minutes ago, when Dorian was talking to his father, Orym wouldn't dream to interrupt because it was such an important conversation. But I think because of how integral the relationships between fathers and sons are to Orym and his history and how much he loves Dorian, when he sees the father moving through the crowd, he bounces and starts darting between people's legs through the crowd and follows him outside and darts ahead and gets in his path.
TALIESIN: I'm staying out of this one.
LIAM: Sir?
MATT: "Yes."
LIAM: Excuse me, if I may, I think you probably saw us standing.
MATT: "Indeed, and it's a very brave thing you're all doing. Of the Air Ashari."
LIAM: That's right.
MATT: "Right, I recognize the--"
LIAM: That's right.
MATT: "Of course we-- I'm happy to listen, if I might."
LIAM: Well, I really just wanted to offer my condolences on the loss of your son.
MATT: "Ah."
LIAM: I spent time with both of them, and the heart and the valor that both of your sons have displayed in recent times, it's important to me, and I think probably important to you to know that, and you should be very proud. I hope you are.
MATT: "I appreciate that."
LIAM: I know where we're going is probably a little daunting for any parent, but-- I would tell you that I would look out for him, but seeing as he just saved my life a day ago, it's probably more fitting to let you know that he'll be looking out for me.
MATT: "Perhaps you'll have the chance to return the favor."
LIAM: He's carved a very impressive verse in the pages of history already. If my friends and I have anything to do with it, he'll pen many more.
MATT: "I look forward to reading them about all of you. If he means this much to all of you, I look forward to the day where I can perhaps get to know you all as well."
LIAM: That will be a beautiful day. Anyway, I don't want to take up your time, and I should get back.
MATT: "Of course, of course."
LIAM: Safe travels to you, sir.
MATT: "You as well."
LIAM: As I leave, I can't help but think: Dang, apple didn't fall far from the tree. (laughter)
ASHLEY: All right.
LAURA: Stone cold fox.
ROBBIE: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
ASHLEY: Your dad's hot.
ROBBIE: Yeah, he's Daddy.
MATT: Yeah, yeah.
ROBBIE: He's Dad and he's Daddy.
MATT: Yeah.
ASHLEY: Yeah. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Your daddy is something else.
TRAVIS: Sure was.
LIAM: I probably, maybe I return--
MATT: Zeru was a hellion when he was young.
LIAM: Maybe I return when they're stapling Braius' new helmet on his head.
MATT: That's about right.
SAM: Sure.
TALIESIN: I definitely just was quietly listening to the whole conversation with you. I was doing the-- As best a giant person can turn their back.
ROBBIE: Are you still giant?
LAURA: You're still really big?
TALIESIN: Oh, I'm huge. I'm not letting that go.
MATT: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Fuck, no. You have no idea how good it feels. But that's a whole conversation we've never had. Yeah, I'm just going to quietly bump into you as you're--
ROBBIE: Oh.
TALIESIN: I owe you an apology.
ROBBIE: Oh! All right. For what?
TALIESIN: (sighs) Fucking Zone of Truth. Fuck it.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
TALIESIN: When I met you, I thought you were a spoiled, soft clown.
ROBBIE: Well. (honks clown nose) (laughter)
MARISHA: Holy shit!
TALIESIN: (laughs) (laughter)
TALIESIN: When you came back, I could see that little stone in your chest getting hard and mean. And I thought I'd be-- Stay soft. We need it. We lost our soft.
LAURA: Stay chill.
TALIESIN: Thank you. I can't imagine how hard or weird that just was. This whole thing is kind of blowing my mind right now. I don't even know if I have an opinion, but.
ROBBIE: Well, thank you.
TALIESIN: I'm glad you're here, and you're not a clown, and you are not spoiled. I do wish you were funnier.
ROBBIE: (laughs) Who's the big softy now?
TALIESIN: (sighs)
ROBBIE: Punch him in the shoulder, but it hurts a lot.
TALIESIN: If it makes you feel better, I did feel that.
ROBBIE: Good.
ROBBIE and TALIESIN: (laugh)
ROBBIE: Thank you. We can only be who we are. I didn't mean to silence you in the halls or--
TALIESIN: Never, and I'm trying to learn how to listen to people. I don't know who I need to be. I don't know who I'm supposed to be. But I've been trying to change. Because who I was wasn't working. And it's nice being surrounded by good people. I like having the role model. Now I'm going to leave because this is getting bad. I don't like what this is doing to my head.
ROBBIE: As he walks away, I go: You did great!
TALIESIN: Fuck you! (laughter)
TALIESIN: Fuck.
MATT: Keyleth steps up to you, Imogen--
TALIESIN: People and their parents, man.
MATT: -- as everyone's finally descending the stairs, and she just sidles alongside you. "I think of everyone here, you carry a very particular burden going into this. Are you all right?"
LAURA: Well, I wasn't lying. I'll be glad to get rid of Ludinus. I don't know how much you know. I can't remember. How much does Keyleth know about our connections? She knows about my mom? She knows all of that?
MATT: I mean, have you-- You said previously you've told her everything.
LAURA: Okay.
MATT: But I'm asking you how comfortable you are in telling her what. Do you think you've told her?
LIAM: We made the case that it was good that you were so close to it, right?
LAURA: Yeah, yeah. But I don't think I've said since we've been back.
MATT: Right. I think she knows about you being an Exaltant Ruidusborn and those facets of it. But she may not be fully aware of the weight. If I recall correctly.
LAURA: My mother helped us on Ruidus.
MATT: "Mm."
LAURA: She almost came back with us. I told her to stay, and it's something I struggle with every day. I didn't trust her in that moment. I didn't trust that she wouldn't take our information and run it back. But she, she spoke to me today before the meeting and gave me some very important information. I was actually looking for the right moment to tell you about it.
MATT: "Oh, okay."
LAURA: Ludinus-- And I tell her everything about the simulacrum and the Unseelie Court.
MATT: She nods.
LAURA: He should be doing that in the next couple days. I think what she said was trustworthy. I think she put herself at great risk to let us know. She might even put herself at greater risk when she helps disseminate the information that we all uncovered in Aeor. If it came down to it and we were around, I would love the chance to get her out. I wouldn't put us all at risk. I wouldn't put everyone here at risk for that, though. I want you to know.
MATT: "I appreciate that. Do you trust her? Do you think we can trust that her aid is sound?"
LAURA: I think so.
MATT: "Okay."
LAURA: The closer they get to Predathos on the moon, though, I think the harder it'll be for her to actually help us. That pull is strong, and if I'm being honest, I'm a little terrified of getting right up next to it. But everyone here, they have my back, and I know, I know, they'll pull me back if need be.
MATT: "Don't let go of that."
LAURA: Do you trust me?
MATT: She glances around for Orym. "I trust him, and he trusts you, so I trust you."
LAURA: Thank you.
MATT: "In a strange way, having been young and had far more weight than I was ever built to hold put upon my shoulders, I also see a bit of myself in each of you, but you in a particular way I can't describe. So I have to."
LAURA: If I'm anything like you, it would be a great compliment.
MATT: "We're all just doing our best. Well. I can look in to see who can possibly investigate this matter. I have to get to," she chuckles for a second, "convince my old friends to go for one final leap into the fire."
LAURA: You presented this plan to everyone without actually convincing them first?
MATT: "Yeah, well, you know, it's not the first time." (laughter)
MATT: "If anything, it's very much--"
ROBBIE: That's awesome!
MARISHA: Yeah, that tracks.
MATT: "In our, as Percival would say, bailiwick. So--
TRAVIS: (Grog) I'm down to clown! (laughter)
TALIESIN: Percy says no. (laughter)
MARISHA: Half of them are here in this room.
ROBBIE and LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: The other half--
ASHLEY: Yes. Will have to deal with it.
MARISHA: -- they'll be fine.
MATT: Yeah.
TALIESIN: I'm babysitting.
MARISHA: Scanlan will have FOMO.
MATT: "But while I'm here, if there's anything I can do to help, anywhere you need to go, any preparation, healing, even just emotional guidance."
LAURA: We do have a couple friends, Ashton and Fearne. They're going to be super exhausted after that display today.
MATT: "All right."
ASHLEY: I'm just in a chair, mouth open. I'm taking a little nap. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Have you turned back, or--
ASHLEY: No.
TALIESIN: Okay. You're on fire in a chair. Okay, cool.
ASHLEY: I'm so tired.
TRAVIS: It's not drool, it's just magma coming out of your mouth.
ASHLEY and MATT: Yeah. (laughter)
TALIESIN: (sizzling drops)
LIAM: Mariana Trench vent going (venting steam)
ASHLEY: Yeah. (laughter)
MATT: "All right. I can certainly help with that. I have a few conversations to get. But, you know how to reach out to me."
LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: "Let me know when and how and whatever else you need. I'll be off here, likely by the end of the day, to tackle my matters. So, let me know soon."
LAURA: Lady Keyleth.
MATT: "Mm-hmm? Keyleth is fine."
LAURA: Good luck.
MATT: "You too." She puts her hand up and brushes the side of your cheek for a second, and as she pulls her hand back, this flower grows off and around the ear and up through the hair, this beautiful bright lavender flower with a little shock of yellow in the stamen. She smiles and walks down the stairs.
LAURA: She's pretty amazing.
LIAM: I've been telling you.
LAURA: (laughs)
LIAM: She's seen some shit.
MATT: You all watch her as she runs and leaps off the stairs, hundreds of feet in the air over Vasselheim, before--
TALIESIN: Goldfish.
MATT: -- turning into a hawk and--
LIAM: Koi. (laughter)
MATT: -- taking off down the--
TRAVIS: She's at it again! (laughter)
TALIESIN: No! No, not again. (laughter)
LAURA: Splat! (laughter)
MARISHA: Why did she do that?
TRAVIS: You said a koi!
MATT: She's broken down--
TALIESIN: I ran out of ideas, I don't know. (laughter)
LAURA: I misunderstood my environment!
MARISHA: Yeah. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Oh, it's the little things. (laughter)
MATT: Oh my god.
MARISHA: I would've loved a goldfish.
MATT: That's so funny!
MARISHA: Respect the fuck out of that.
TRAVIS: Scattering of red mess.
TALIESIN: Still kills me.
MATT: All right. So, you have a little bit of time to prepare, ask questions, figure out what you want to do. Take a tour of a personal museum.
TRAVIS: Fuck, yes.
LIAM: Yeah.
MARISHA: 100%.
LIAM: Got to go to the Chetney stan's house.
ASHLEY and ROBBIE: Yeah.
LAURA: Are we wanting to do anything with this information that we got? Are we wanting to go to the Fey Realm and--
SAM: Yeah.
ROBBIE: Yes.
SAM and ROBBIE: Yeah.
TRAVIS: To the what?
LIAM: To the really cool location described.
LAURA: To the Unseelie Court! Are we wanting to go to--
MARISHA: I know. It sounds so cool.
ASHLEY: We could go there. We could go see--
ROBBIE: That sounds really cool.
ASHLEY: -- Asmodeus for some reason, if you wanted to, I don't know.
SAM: I'm down for that.
LAURA: Oh my gosh. We got a week.
ASHLEY: We got a week.
ROBBIE: You guys know more about Keyleth. Is she a mode of transportation like Essek was?
LAURA: She can Teleport us and Plane Shift us.
TALIESIN: She can do everything.
LIAM: Yeah.
ROBBIE: Maybe that's what part of the offer was when we were leaving mode of transport to get us somewhere we want to go.
TRAVIS: Did your mom say that she was going in the next day or two for her thing?
LAURA: Yes.
TRAVIS: It does feel like we should empower some super powerful allies to maybe jointly Scry on multiple leyline intersections and see where she shows up or--
LAURA: Oh, yeah.
TRAVIS: -- divert that. Maybe that's her way of asking for a--
MATT: Roll d20 for me.
ROBBIE: Mm!
LAURA: Oh! (waggles tongue) Oh wait.
LIAM: That's a crazy roll.
LAURA: Okay. Just a d20 randomly?
MATT: Just a d20.
LAURA: 14.
MATT: 14, okay. Cool. Continue.
LIAM: Damn it.
MARISHA: I hate it when that happens.
LAURA: Why?
MATT: Mm. (I don't know)
TRAVIS: It's the best. Makes my back hurt. (laughter)
TRAVIS: I know there's an answer back there. He just circled something. True threat behind that little piece of wood.
MATT: Sorry. Continue your plotting.
TRAVIS: So we could do that and maybe divert, and then we could go after the Seelie?
LAURA: Yeah, yeah. I mean, the Seelie would--
TRAVIS: Try to contact.
LAURA: The Seelie would be, Unseelie would be happening at this same time, potentially. I could try to dream-talk to my mom and get an actual idea of where or when she'd be doing that.
TRAVIS: It doesn't compromise her.
LAURA: I know that's the only thing. Like if Ludinus is around when I tapped in, it would be bad.
TALIESIN: I think Ira is definitely a good pull for this. We have people. We don't have to do everything ourselves.
LAURA: But they're on the moon. She would be doing it here. Ira could potentially be here, but--
TALIESIN: He could be anywhere at this point.
MARISHA: You mean Ira for the Fey Realm--
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MARISHA: --stuff?
MARISHA: Yeah.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Hell, we could--
MARISHA: We can always check in with him.
TALIESIN: I can, I could even pull some strings, get some of my old people together. Give him a team of people who he can--
MARISHA: Also Nana Morri.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LIAM: We could touch down at Nana's house first and go from there.
LAURA: Because she can make it to where we won't get a--
LIAM: Give us the deets.
ASHLEY: Weird time?
LAURA: Yeah, the weird time.
ROBBIE: She can potentially stop Ludinus from showing the world the orb?
LAURA: She can try. She said she would try.
TRAVIS: Oh, the crisis orbs were activated. So this squad should be able to cover the intersected leylines.
LAURA: Yeah.
TRAVIS: It should be able to (alarm pings)
LIAM: Yeah. This is all the power players.
LAURA: Okay.
LIAM: Nana also helped us sneak around over there, too--
LAURA: Yeah.
LIAM: -- so we could maybe get some of that action.
LAURA: Yeah.
MARISHA: Yeah. The crisis orbs are interesting. It does feel like maybe there's-- We're in a city of so many high powered mages, I wonder if they can help once again, help take control of the leylines or something.
MATT: You can ask.
MARISHA: Just don't know how any of that would work.
LAURA: I feel like if they could take control of the leylines, they would have done it at this point.
LIAM: Would have-- yeah. It's like trying to control--
MARISHA: Take control, but if your mom is trying to tap into the leylines to send out a message, I'm just wondering if other people could--
ASHLEY: Tap in?
MARISHA: -- tap in and interfere.
LAURA: Maybe they can set up posts at every nexus?
ROBBIE: That's interesting.
TALIESIN: That's actually that's a really good idea.
LAURA: Because there's only so many, right? How many major nexuses, nexuses, nexi--
MATT: You're uncertain.
TALIESIN: Nexi?
MATT: At any given point in time, the leyline nexuses... Make an arcana check for me. Arcana or history, actually.
LAURA: I am shit on both.
MATT: Different DCs for each.
LAURA: 12.
MATT: 12? You have no idea how many nexuses exist in the world. Unfortunately.
TALIESIN: There's enough mages here. We can just yell it out real loud.
LAURA: Would any of us know?
MARISHA: Is Allura still around?
TALIESIN: Yell "Marco" out and hearing, "Bolo."
MARISHA: Allura?
MATT: No. Allura has moved on to multiple conversations. A lot of the people present immediately got pulled into plotting discussions and starting to work out, it wasn't like everyone just scattered and went to lunch. There's still a lot of people who are talking up in the Sanctuary and people that have also scattered out for other meetings. You guys have-- Even Keyleth had to head off to something. So you're left to your own devices at the moment.
ROBBIE: In addition to supporting us for the mission that we had, does the vibe of the room feel like the plan as a whole is a go from everyone? Is that what this planning is?
MATT: What the Highbearer was saying is, unless somebody else comes up with a better plan, this is what people are going to work on right now. Because with time being what it is, this is sound enough to push towards and gather people for, and they could always pivot once everyone's together. But right now, this is the most sound plan.
LIAM: They're gathering the two squads and they're doing-- They're going to do recon of the Malleus.
MATT: Keep. Yes.
LIAM: Keep.
TALIESIN: So this was a thing I didn't want to harsh the vibe as it was going, but-- I passed you a note for a little psychic when Keyleth mentioned that we had ways of getting onto the moon that no one knew about. I was prodding Orym to be like, does anyone not look surprised? Or is anyone, does anyone making a weird face?
LAURA: Oh, this is like super backtracking?
TALIESIN: This was a super backtrack, I know, of just like there was-- I just didn't want to stop and be like, make a perception roll or anything like that.
MATT: Sure, make a perception check. Actually, no, this would be an insight check.
LIAM: Insight, that's going to go great.
MATT: Everyone's reacting in the room.
TALIESIN: Sure.
MATT: The whole room is reacting.
LIAM: 26.
MATT: 26 is not bad. I mean, most people are like, "What does that even mean?" There's a few people that are like, you don't catch anything that feels like anybody acting like, (conspiratorially) "Aah, what do they mean?" You know. It's also hundreds and hundreds of people around you. Even with the 26.
LIAM: I was looking at a different character. (laughter)
TALIESIN: What does that mean?
LIAM: Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it.
MARISHA: For how long?
LIAM: No, just for the last five minutes. So that was more like a 19.
MATT: 19. Definitely didn't pick up any.
LIAM: Don't worry about it.
TALIESIN: Okay. Don't worry. It was just a thing that was like-- I'm not stopping this right now.
LIAM: Much different modifier.
ROBBIE: So I understand tactically, what helping mom would-- What would the boon tactically be for going to the Fey Realm again? That I didn't quite pick up on. Like how would that serve us?
SAM: Just to stop Ludinus in some element of this plan.
LAURA: My guess is that if Ludinus gets the Unseelie Court on his side this time around, that the attack on the Malleus Key is going to be all that much harder.
LIAM: Tougher.
ROBBIE: I got it.
LAURA: What our goal here is to stop him from getting the Unseelie Court on his side. It will help the entire infiltration.
ROBBIE: Right. Okay, so it's like thinning his forces either way.
LAURA: Yeah.
ROBBIE: He might have the common populace on his side if the orb goes public, but he's definitely recruiting a potentially powerful other strike force.
LAURA: I think if the orb goes public, then the gods will be more diminished because more people are going to lose faith and therefore their power is going to be--
TALIESIN: Waned.
LAURA: That's just my guess.
TRAVIS: Is the Bright Queen visible in the room still?
TALIESIN: That was a question.
MATT: If you want to go back and check, since you've all stepped out on the steps, heading down--
LIAM: We're on the steps now.
MATT: -- you can go back and look if you want.
TRAVIS: Yeah. I'll-- (quick footsteps)
MATT: All right, you head back. Make a perception check.
LAURA: Just picture Chet like (la, la, la, la, la).
TRAVIS: 16. 17.
MATT: 17. It takes a moment. But you do see back in the forum chamber, she hasn't moved far from where she was primarily sitting during the opening and the ending of the events of the initial forum conversation. Currently in discussion with a few other figures there. You can see there are individuals that are mid-conversation. You're uncertain from this distance if it's tactical, if it's political, if it's trying to get an autograph, who knows?
TRAVIS: Does she have any guard around her?
MATT: She does. She has, from what you can see, two armored Kryn Dynasty personal guards.
TRAVIS: Can I find one and make my way over and just gesture with the hand and say--
LAURA and MARISHA: (garbled) Makin' my way
TRAVIS: -- if the Bright Queen has a moment for an audience.
MATT: Soldier shoots you a glance, you can see the dark elf gives a very stern look in your direction. Make a persuasion check for me.
TRAVIS: Whoa! That's natural 19.
MATT: Looks at you and is about to do the hand, like shove off expression and then recognizes you from the discussion earlier and goes--
TRAVIS: Chetney Pock O'Pea, High Hunter and Lupine Paragun. Paragun... Paragon. (laughter)
MATT: "Perhaps one day the words will find your mouth."
MARISHA: Oh!
LAURA: Oh shit. (laughs)
ASHLEY: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Somewhere, Percy chuckles.
MATT: And leans in and whispers to the Bright Queen. She nods, puts a hand back like this for a second, and finishes the conversation to the side. There's some direct whispers. You have to wait a moment. About a minute-and-a-half pass before she turns back.
TRAVIS: (whistles) Wow.
MATT: "Yes, Chetney Pock O'Pea?"
TRAVIS: Your helm is so impressive. May I just say it is quite an honor to be in the same space as the ruler of the Dynasty. I have had very rare occasion to meet fellows from your domain. I wanted to ask in case it isn't expressed later. Your powers, your magics from your realm are extremely rare and baffling. If there's anything that you might consider granting us or leaving with us as we consider our part of this approach, I would be most grateful. Your staff, for instance, would be an incredible boon, but I realize you might need that. So, you know, I'm just throwing the ask out there.
MATT: "No. What you ask is not impossible. The tasks that you walk towards are dangerous beyond word or comparison. It would be an honor to bestow upon you this singular artifact of the Kryn Dynasty."
ROBBIE: (laughs)
MATT: As she takes it and kneels before you and places it.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
TRAVIS: You motherfuckers.
ASHLEY: Wait.
LAURA: No.
TRAVIS: Thank you, my lady.
MATT: She pulls it back. "Of course not."
TRAVIS: Oh. Yes. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Ah... ha ha.
MATT: Her guard chuckle under their helmets. She goes--
TRAVIS: Well done. Ha. Ha.
MATT: "I respect the brazen request. That was quite bold of you, young'un."
ASHLEY and TALIESIN: (intrigued noises)
LIAM: She's thousands of years old.
TRAVIS: Mm!
MATT: "I appreciate this for both the playful arrogance and the laugh that I desperately needed this day." And she's looking at you. You expected to be, given the context of this... condemnation, but--
TRAVIS: (laughs)
MATT: No, there is an amusement and a nod to it.
MARISHA: Are you gonna fuck the Bright Queen?
TRAVIS: Who says I haven't already? (laughter)
MATT: She does. (laughter)
LIAM: The BQILF.
TRAVIS: Respect. I just wanted to float it. And thank you again for speaking on our behalf. I realize what a rarity it is for you to be sharing the room with some of these individuals. And so again, I thank you.
MATT: She puts a hand up to one of her guard and leans into you. Sets her staff off to the other and kneels to your eye level.
TRAVIS: I'm single.
MATT: She goes, "You might yet be a bright spot in our future and history, should you be willing and open. You travel with one who is themself a rift between many contradictions. The one you call Ashton. We are very interested in who or what they are and what they're capable of. If you could return to us when this is done with as much information of their nature, perhaps even a means of bringing them into our control, there are great many rewards that could await such an ambitious chairman."
ROBBIE: Ooh.
TRAVIS: Interesting proposal. I will give it great care and consideration.
MATT: "Indeed. Just think on it, Chetney Pock O'Pea."
TRAVIS: Bright Queen.
MATT: She stands back up and takes her staff and leans back. "My apologies," and continues in conversation with--
TRAVIS: I turn around and-- (laughter)
MARISHA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Are you keeping this information to yourself, or are you--
TRAVIS: Fuck are you talking about?
TALIESIN: Okay.
MATT: (maniacal laughs)
TALIESIN: Just curious.
MATT: (maniacal laughs)
MARISHA: Holy shit.
LIAM: That woman could drop kick you through time.
TRAVIS: A hundred percent. Turns out she's spoken for--
MARISHA: Oh, oh.
TRAVIS: I saw her step up and she looked over, and she was putting out the vibe. I just had to check.
MARISHA: I do believe-- It seemed like it. I thought she was going to give you a wet willy for a second.
TRAVIS: I didn't think that. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Did she help out at all? Did she have anything to say? Does she...
TRAVIS: She said that what we were doing was extremely heroic. It was a part of history. That she personally was intrigued by my involvement in it all, and that the dynasty was very interested in procuring some upgrades.
LIAM: Do she give you any tips or boons or--
TRAVIS: I actually asked, and she offered her staff and I said: No, you dumb bitch, don't give me your staff. Then the guards were like, "Don't talk to her that way."
TALIESIN: That's a lot, right there. I was--
TRAVIS: I'm outside, right? Not under the Zone of Truth.
MATT: Correct.
TRAVIS: Yeah. I was like: Yeah, bitch! (laughter)
LAURA: And I said b--
TALIESIN: I feel like I threw her off earlier. I was going to go apologize at some point.
TRAVIS: You should. You know, I feel like sometimes conversations are important to have. You don't want any regerts (regrets).
ASHLEY: Hey, what if she got something to say?
TALIESIN: That's kind of what I was thinking. Are you daring me?
ASHLEY: Yeah. Of course. Go talk to her.
TALIESIN: Okay. I have five minutes before the migraine comes back. And it's so rare that I have absolutely no pain in my system. So one second and, well, I'm going to go in for a quick for a very quick kiss. Are you still on fire?
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: If you're down. Yeah.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Just because this is the only time I can actually be chill. Because I'm not in full pain when I'm in this set. Yeah, I do not have my normal pain when I'm--
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TALIESIN: How much fire damage do I take?
ASHLEY: Oh! (laughter)
TRAVIS: As if it mattered.
ASHLEY: You die from my kiss. Let's see. Like a d8.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
ASHLEY: One point of damage. (laughter)
TALIESIN: My ring absorbed seven. So I'm good.
ASHLEY: Perfect.
MATT: There you go.
TALIESIN: Thank you. Needed the luck. See you later. And I'm going to--
SAM: Don't you think you're leading him on?
TALIESIN: I love everyone. (laughter)
ROBBIE: Oh, come on!
ASHLEY: No! We'll deal with him later. (laughter)
ROBBIE: Oh no.
MATT: All right.
TALIESIN: All right.
ROBBIE: Wow.
TALIESIN: Do I go towards her? Do I go towards another? I'm going to go towards-- Yeah, I'm going to--
MATT: All right. So as you--
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: -- trek into this revolving door that is the Platinum Sanctuary for you guys over the past 30 minutes.
TALIESIN: I've got only a few more minutes of this before I shrink. So I'm trying to take advantage of not having my head hurt.
MATT: You know, the crowd's still sitting in the space and numerous conversations around. She hasn't moved from the moment that you were there.
TRAVIS: He's going in. I'll just, I'll go up to the door and just watch him go in from the doorway.
MATT: So he's going to, like, coast into it. You catch her eye. To the side. The two guards turn towards you.
TALIESIN: You're adorable.
MATT: Looks down.
TALIESIN: Yeah. I just look at the two guards like, you're so cute. Excuse me. I just have to have a brief chit chat.
MATT: They aren't standing in your way.
TALIESIN: Oh!
MATT: There's a gap there. They both just stood to attention towards you. And she has already turned to look at you.
TALIESIN: I feel like I owe you an apology. I was not aware of how much I feel like I threw you. Didn't mean it. Trying to be less of an asshole to people.
MATT: "Well, good luck with that."
TALIESIN: So far, middly.
MARISHA: Are you?
TRAVIS: (laughs)
TALIESIN: I know this is strange, and I understand-- I don't understand why it bothers you, but I'm willing to listen, and I'm trying to know myself better. I would be happy to tell you whatever it's like to have this, tell you anything about it.
MATT: "Good. Then ensure you return to us safely. There is much you can learn, much for you to see."
TALIESIN: Any advice?
MATT: "Concentrate. Look inward when you need to focus, and you'll find the smallest bead of light within. Hold onto it and let it bloom."
TALIESIN: I have one last question, if you don't mind.
MATT: "I'm not done."
TALIESIN: Oh! (laughter)
TALIESIN: Sorry, I have a hard time concentrating.
MATT: "I have noticed." (chuckling)
ASHLEY: I love her.
MATT: "I do not know what you hold inside either. But there are signatures of power that are familiar and intriguing. In this case, I cannot assure you that what you can muster can be controlled, but with care and practice and time, perhaps you too could break the very fundamental powers of this universe, if they don't break you first. So find that light. Hold on to it and imagine."
TALIESIN: That I can do. I don't know much about you or where you come from. But I know some things, and I want to know, you have a relationship to the Arch Heart? The god of art and beauty.
MATT: "Not at all."
TALIESIN: I would like to know what "not at all" means. I'm trying to form some opinions about a world that I don't really-- It's a little bigger, and you seem clever and mean and I like that.
MATT: "I am slightly curious and mildly concerned that one of the heroes we're sending to be the savior of our entire existence is just beginning a path of self discovery." (laughter)
MATT: "But, I suppose everyone has their time and place."
MARISHA: I love her.
ASHLEY: I love her so much.
TALIESIN: Gosh, you sound old.
MATT: "You have no idea."
TRAVIS: (laughs)
MATT: "No, I do not partake in these playful faiths. I believe in something older, grander. If you hold onto that light inside you, maybe you will see it before I have the chance to show you. So, discover your path, and when you return, let's compare notes." She turns and starts walking with her soldiers and other people are like, "Bright Queen, we're not-- Bright--" and they start following after her, and she exits the Sanctuary, leaving three or four different diplomats in the lurch following behind, trying to continue their conversations.
TRAVIS: Does she walk out the door where we're--
MATT: She does, and as she walks past, she looks at you and goes--
TALIESIN: I start-- Wow. She-- So I walked by you. God, she's really into you. Jesus!
TRAVIS: Did she talk about me a lot?
TALIESIN: Oh, that's all-- She wouldn't shut up about it.
TRAVIS: I don't blame her, frankly.
TALIESIN: She was just like: Why didn't he take my staff?
ASHLEY: Might be kind of fun, Chet.
TRAVIS: Really?
TALIESIN: She wanted you to grab a hold of that staff and just--
ASHLEY: Never let go.
TALIESIN: (laughs)
TRAVIS: You're an asshole.
TALIESIN: I know.
LAURA: Hi. Hi.
MATT: You look over and you see the fantastic Scalebearer compatriot who's waving, Waylon.
TRAVIS: Waylon.
LAURA: Waylon!
MATT: He's like, "Ah--"
LAURA: Hi.
MATT: "Hey. I just want to make sure I didn't miss a message or anything.
LAURA: Oh. No.
MATT: "When he's available. I'm completely done with my--
TRAVIS: (laughs)
LAURA: You didn't, but are you done?
MATT: "-- responsibilities." "I'm finished, and I guess whenever, whenever you're ready."
TRAVIS: Talk to me like I'm real busy. Oh, yeah!
MARISHA: You know, it just feels like--
TRAVIS: I understand. No, I can't. I just cant.
MARISHA: There's so much-- So if you have any amount of time--
TRAVIS: I can't, I'm sorry. I'm too busy.
MARISHA: Your contribution would be so valuable.
TRAVIS: All right, fine.
LAURA: Chet!
TRAVIS: Oh, yes? Yes, Imogen? Assistant.
LAURA: Waylon's free, if you want to go ogle at your old work.
TRAVIS: (sighs) Is my calendar clear?
TALIESIN: Is your colander what?
TRAVIS: I'm sure, I'm sure it's fine. If you would be so kind, Waylon, lead the way.
MATT: "The honor is absolutely mine. Yeah, no. Come along, everybody. I make no promises. It's not a whole lot. But at the very least, maybe it'll, you know, set you on the rest of your day. (giggles awkwardly)" (laughter)
TALIESIN: Is that a Whitestone accent?
LAURA: What does that even mean? (laughs)
TRAVIS: Yes! Yes!
MATT: He is a mess.
TRAVIS: It's working!
ASHLEY: Wait.
LAURA: I love him.
TRAVIS: It only took 400 years to build momentum! (laughter)
ASHLEY: I want to insight check him.
MATT: Go for it.
TALIESIN: Good call.
MATT: What are you trying to find out?
ASHLEY: I am trying to find out--
TRAVIS: Why he's obsessed with me and not you?
ASHLEY: No!
TRAVIS: Jelly?
ASHLEY: No, I am trying to find out if he's--
TRAVIS: A dragon?
LIAM: A murderer.
LAURA: If he's full of shit and he's going to trap us?
ASHLEY: Yeah, if he's full of shit.
MATT: Okay. What'd you roll?
ASHLEY: I rolled very high, so I rolled--
MATT: Oh.
TALIESIN: Ooh!
ASHLEY: -- 29.
MATT: (impressed exhale) Okay.
LAURA: That's very high.
TRAVIS: Can't you just let me have this? Let me have this!
ASHLEY: I just--
SAM: Guys, we're going to be in Anime NYC. Was that one of the announcements?
TRAVIS: Uh-huh!
SAM: Anime NYC--
LAURA: Anima.
SAM: Anima, an-ma-ma-ha. Hope to see you all there. Please come meet us.
ROBBIE: Have you guys been before?
SAM: No.
ROBBIE: It's a great show.
LAURA: I think we went a long time ago.
ROBBIE: It's an amazing show. Yeah.
LIAM: Meanwhile.
ASHLEY: We got to go.
MATT: "So, anyway, I've been working here for, god, going on a few decades. four or five decades."
LAURA: Wow.
MATT: "It's been--
LAURA: How old are you, Waylon?
MATT: "Me, I'm just over 95. You stop really keeping quite count here."
TRAVIS: It's what I tell them.
LIAM: Wow.
MATT: "Yeah."
MARISHA: Where are you from originally?
MATT: "Oh, I've been here most of my life. I just worked my way up through the structure. You know, temples have a hierarchy. You have to earn your way through, and I've worked really hard to gain the trust and respect of the Highbearer and all the other Scalebearers to become one."
ASHLEY: Are you a big fan of the Platinum Dragon? Or not a big fan, a follower?
MATT: "Oh, the Platinum Dragon is the way and the light, the grandiose, unfathomable justice which shines upon us all. I am--"
MARISHA: Jesus.
MATT: "Oh, man. This is a little embarrassing. I'm actually a very influential and important figure here in the Sanctuary. I just, I mean, come on."
LIAM: Everyone's got to have a hobby.
ASHLEY: Yeah.
TRAVIS: Come on!
ASHLEY: I mean, it's the C-POP.
LIAM: I have a couple, I'm not the collector that I think you're sounding like, but I have a few. I appreciate-- Yeah.
MATT: "Really? Would you sell them?"
TALIESIN: How much?
LIAM: I'd have to talk
LIAM: to my mom back home.
MATT: "Okay--
LIAM: They're not mint. They're well loved.
MATT: "Okay, then there's negotiable transitions there. But that's fine."
ASHLEY: I'm going to show him my little wolf on my belt.
TRAVIS: The rating system is very strict.
ASHLEY: He made this for me.
MATT: "I can tell immediately. Whoa!"
ASHLEY: You want to touch it?
MATT: "Look at the chisel marks on this one. It's striated against the grain of the wood. Look at how he does that!"
LAURA: Look, here's a horse.
ASHLEY: It's really something.
LAURA: He made me this horse.
MATT: "I mean, you do that! Oh! Anyway." You see he's struggling between three different selves and is both embarrassed but excited, but also trying to be important. He's about to melt down.
TRAVIS: My eyes are just watering up the whole time.
MARISHA: Are we all pulling out our--
TALIESIN: Oh, this one tells you to leave so that I don't have to.
LAURA: If you wind it, it gallops.
ASHLEY: Well, he made me the horse and all these people.
LAURA: The legs catch a little bit on--
LIAM: This is like a senator who's a lowkey mega Trekkie.
ROBBIE: Yeah!
TALIESIN: Oh man!
ROBBIE: Fans come in all shapes and sizes.
MATT: "I assume all of these are deeply beloved keepsakes, but if any of you would be interested."
MARISHA: He made me this doll.
ASHLEY: Never.
MARISHA: Her name's Sashimi. She has knives for hands.
MATT: "I have not seen a macabre twist of yours. Is this like a new period of your artistic expression?"
TRAVIS: You put words to it. Yes. That's absolutely what it is.
MATT: "Oh my goodness."
MARISHA: Sometimes I make her come alive and she can stab you.
MATT: "That'd make his--"
LIAM: This is Chetney's Brecht period.
MATT: "-- seventh artistic era. You're in a new--
MARISHA: What?
MATT: "Oh my goodness."
LAURA: I can't wait to see this.
MATT: He collects himself.
TALIESIN: I am losing--
ROBBIE: He made me a beautiful toy boat.
TALIESIN: We should power down and get--
MARISHA: Where is it?
ROBBIE: I gave it to the street urchin. (laughter)
MATT: "Which urchin?" (laughter)
ROBBIE: I don't know. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Desperation. What city?!
MATT: As we shift a little later in the afternoon. You've been led through the surrounding neighborhood here in the Stone Talon's Reach to a modest abode for a Scalebearer. But, you know, a nice home that is built towards the base of the Heaven's Stair. It has a beautiful little garden that is kept with a number of fine silver and stone statues that represent both the symbol or incorporate the symbol of the Platinum Dragon, are themselves drake-like or reminiscent of the dragon's claw. What have you been doing over there? Wow.
ROBBIE: He started it.
MATT: (laughs)
MARISHA: (laughs)
MATT: Oh!
ROBBIE: Ah!
ASHLEY: I didn't touch it!
MARISHA: What did you do?
ROBBIE: Chaos!
ASHLEY: It was just the wind. Sorry.
ROBBIE: I was listening to lore.
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: (laughs) Glad somebody was.
ASHLEY: Yeah, yeah, yeah. (laughter)
MATT: I'm just slapping my dick in the wind over here. (laughter)
TALIESIN: Dirty-ass voice actors.
MATT: I know.
LAURA and MARISHA: Dirty-ass voice actors.
MATT: I called it the top.
LIAM: Laura saw this and her instinct was to compete .
LAURA: No, that's not true. I wasn't competing, I was inspired.
MATT: Anyway, as you all approach through the courtyard, he pulls out his ring of keys and he's like, "Anyway." You see sees his hands shaking. You can hear the keys jingling, and he's like, "Anyway."
TRAVIS: Steady on, Waylon, steady on.
MARISHA: As we walk, just real quick.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: Can I fall back next to Fearne, also kind of clocking her clocking him. Do you-- Is he a genuine fan or do you think this has anything to do with the-- Wait, do we know?
LAURA: No.
MARISHA: Fuck!
ASHLEY: Wait.
TRAVIS: What?
LAURA: We don't know about the deal.
MARISHA: I didn't know about the deal with Nana Morri.
ASHLEY: Yeah, we don't know.
TALIESIN: I really want this to just be a horrible murder trap.
MATT: No, none of you know that.
MARISHA: We don't know.
ASHLEY: We don't know.
TALIESIN: I am praying for horrible murder trap.
TRAVIS: What deal?
MARISHA: Shit!
ASHLEY: He's a big fan.
MARISHA: Just a big fan?
ASHLEY: Probably like number one fan.
MARISHA: Number one fan.
ASHLEY: Yeah, it's like he's--
LIAM: He seems nice!
ASHLEY: -- possibly in love. Maybe not. I'm kind of throwing that in there.
MARISHA: Like an adoration.
ASHLEY: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
MARISHA: Right, right, right. All right.
MATT: (key clicks) "Okay. Sorry, it took me a minute there. It gets stuck, you know, in the weather. Gets cold at night. Anyway. Welcome to the Chateau de C-POP." (laughter)
MATT: As the door opens up--
ASHLEY: I'm so excited for this.
MATT: -- you enter this chamber. You aside. You see, from an exterior that is stone, painted wood reinforced, but if very much befits the rest of the surrounding architecture of the Silver Talon's Reach. It is modest, but also has elements of its roof and gilded edges and beautiful bits of ivy that are covered towards the sides that curl down the outer rim of the building. He opens the door and the interior is wall to wall shades of worked and stained wood. The facets of the interior that aren't made signature, like decorations, have been retrofitted to match the tone and themes.
TRAVIS: (laughs)
TALIESIN: Oh boy!
MATT: It feels like the most polished cabin interior ever, with cabinets after cabinets, after cabinets that are filled with all manner of knickknacks and sculptures and toys and all of these incredible-- This place, there are 17 chairs you can see that have no place to be where they are, but they're clustered in corners, lining each other. The walls are just lined with chairs.
LAURA: Holy--
MATT: Tables, there are pitchers, there are cups, and you can see it is a veritable tiny museum. As you begin to look at these wonderful things in play, and you're like, oh, there's more beyond this room. You realize his house is built into the side of the thing. There's a room behind it that opens up into a full display chamber--
SAM: Oh my god.
MATT: -- with labels. You can see where they were acquired, what year. You can see there are extensive-- Extensive work has gone into cleaning, caring, and setting as much information that existed about each of these pieces. They are labeled with estimations of their creation with a year range of where it's believed they may have been crafted, along with like a few little letters next to it. You are uncertain what that coding means in his cataloging process.
ASHLEY: What's this coding mean? (laughter)
MATT: "Oh, that-- See, that's how I can make sure that I ascertain at what point it was both purchased by me and represents the general quarter century in which the C-Poppers have relegated the possibility of his creation by trying to cross-reference it with the different periods of artistic inspiration."
ASHLEY: Damn!
LIAM: Whoa! I have this same pegasus. Look at that.
ROBBIE: It's the Waylon Decimal System.
ASHLEY: Waylon Decimal System.
LAURA: When did you become a C-Popper, Waylon?
MATT: "Oh. You know, like all of us C-Poppers--"
ASHLEY: Last week.
MATT: "-- before we truly came to realize who and what we were and found our community, there's that-- There's the beginning where we find our first piece. I was quite young. Just maybe a custodial acolyte here in the temple. And, there was this traveling merchant who was bringing knickknacks and keepsakes from afar. They'd come across the sea, and amongst their collection, nothing really of interest except for one." You see, his eyes go wide and have a thousand yard stare as he darts past and around to this massive iron safe, and it just goes: (dial turning)
LAURA: Oh man.
MATT: Pulls another the key, and another key, and turns them both at the same time.
LAURA: (laughs) Oh my god.
MATT: (door screeches open)
TALIESIN: This is the room you're going die in.
MATT: It opens. (laughter)
TALIESIN: I put in your head.
TRAVIS: I'm okay with that.
MATT: He pulls out this tiny wooden egg. What's special about this egg--
TRAVIS: Oh boy.
MATT: -- Chetney?
TRAVIS: That's from my oblivion edition.
MARISHA: (laughs)
TRAVIS: If you twist it a certain way, it reveals that which is most precious.
MATT: "Precious. Yeah." (laughter)
ASHLEY: Yes! (laughter)
TRAVIS: Go ahead. Show them.
MARISHA: Oh my god!
ROBBIE: Oh no! (laughter)
ASHLEY: We finish each other's sentences. (laughter)
MATT: I'm so happy. (laughter)
MATT: He presses the sides of it and the tops, and then twists them in a way where you watch this solid egg, the wood lattices outward--
ASHLEY: (gasps)
TALIESIN: Whoa.
MATT: -- and turns, and as it does, you can see there's a small platform hidden inside. On it is this tiny little pearl, this shined pearl.
ASHLEY: Chet!
TALIESIN: That's pretty cool, man.
MATT: "So it's a safe within a safe."
ASHLEY: Woo!
LAURA: Totally amazing.
TRAVIS: They're very rare.
MATT: "Yeah."
LAURA: How much would--
LIAM: How many of those did you make?
LAURA: -- something like that for--
TALIESIN: Mm-hmm.
LAURA: -- go?
MATT: "By our account, there's only four of these that exist in Exandria, three that remain undamaged. I'm sorry. This one is pristine."
ASHLEY: Is that how many you made? Did you make any more?
TRAVIS: (gravelly) There is another. (laughter)
MATT: "Really?"
TRAVIS: A fifth. I carry it.
MATT: He puts it back in it safe. (laughter)
MATT: And he starts writing down. (laughter)
MATT: "Okay, a fifth, fifth--"
ROBBIE: The bed. Why?
LIAM: That's also a safe within a safe.
ASHLEY: Waylon, do you-- Do you live here or this is strictly just a museum for C-POP?
MATT: "Yes."
ASHLEY: Okay.
MATT: "This is my home."
SAM: Do you charge admission?
MATT: "Not for you, by any means."
SAM: But for others?
TRAVIS: Of course. Look at some of these pieces. This chair is from my TALO Collection. My Take a Load Off collection, it's absolutely pristine. You've cared for it beyond comprehension.
MATT: Writing everything you're saying down. He's like, "The TALO Collection, is that the Third Age? The third inspiration. Okay. TALO Collection. We've had-- It's all been interpretive from our side and we have our little code language about which each era represents. But like if I could just pick your brain."
TRAVIS: Of course.
MARISHA: Literally!?
TRAVIS: No, I mean just an evening. I'm sure he has questions.
MARISHA: Oh!
TRAVIS: After all, a master craftsman is nothing without an apprentice every once in a while.
MATT: He faints. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Oh no! Oh no! He fell into the cabinet.
SAM: Lay on Hands. (laughter)
MATT: "(gasp) Oh no! I'm so-- That's so-- (panicked noise)"
TRAVIS: You knocked a couple of things off the shelf. And I reached out to pick one up. I was just making-- You have one-- Oh, this is from my Sensual Collection. I hope this isn't used. It's just curved.
MATT: He's like, "I thought that was an incense holder."
TRAVIS: Sure.
ASHLEY: What is this? (laughter)
TALIESIN: I had no idea that people--
TRAVIS: There are no rules.
TALIESIN: I had no idea this sort of thing was actually--
MATT: "Oh god!"
TALIESIN: We cool, we cool. (laughter)
ASHLEY: Wait, do you remember the name of the merchant that you met?
MATT: "I don't."
ASHLEY: It was just--
MATT: "It just out of the rest of the riff raff and noise, this piece found me and he only charged me five gold. But I know it's worth so much more. And it is--"
ASHLEY: What was the first piece?
LAURA: How much is it worth?
MATT: "Well, we're still calculating from a worldwide collector's degree based on continuous stages of auctioneering and trade. But this today sits somewhere easily within the 80 to 150 gold range depending on the interest. I say that because that's the offers that I'm getting, but I will never sell it."
LAURA: Wow!
MATT: He puts it gently back in the safe and closes it.
LIAM: You have to make this fellow a custom piece.
ASHLEY: You might be the greatest woodworker of all time.
TALIESIN: This zine, is this like a buyer's guide that you publish, just like things like that? Do you have a copy?
MATT: "Well, it's more of a zine, but like it's we--
TALIESIN: Market trends?
MATT: "I have a friend who has a printer in the south side of Vasselheim, and we go ahead and do distributions quarterly."
MARISHA: Do you have meet ups? Like a place--
MATT: "We've only had a couple. It's a long distance for a lot of people. So we have regional meetups.
LIAM: Like a POP Conference?
MARISHA: Yeah, like--
SAM: POP-Cons?
MATT: He writes that down.
TALIESIN: POP-Con?
TRAVIS: 800 gold. It's out of my wildest dreams. 800 gold. Finally getting the (teary) recognition it deserves.
MATT: "Oh, you don't even want to know what I paid for that table."
TRAVIS: Yes, I do. (laughter)
TRAVIS: I must know.
MATT: "Well, the mahogany that keeps all the-- There's-- As you know, there are five different trees inlaid throughout it. It is a masterpiece of craftsmanship. I wasn't the only bidder, but I did win out at a solid 800 gold."
TRAVIS: (gasps)
TALIESIN: He wasn't the only bidder.
SAM: With all these pieces. They're amazing. But are there any fakes?
LAURA: Oh yeah.
TRAVIS: Yeah. Let me look.
LIAM: You'd know, right, Chet?
MATT: Make a perception check.
TRAVIS: They're all my children.
ASHLEY: Good call.
TRAVIS: Eugh! With advantage because this is my fucking work.
MATT: Yes, I would, actually. No, if there was-- No, no, you're-- (screaming)
ASHLEY: Guidance!
TRAVIS: Eight.
MATT: Eight.
ROBBIE: You got tears in your eyes.
TRAVIS: I got tears in my eyes. I'm all fogged up!
ROBBIE: You've got tears in your eyes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. (laughter)
TRAVIS: This is 400 years coming back.
MATT: Yep. Yep. No, and it's true. You-- You have the most discerning eye for your craftsmanship on any other day. But in this moment, the emotion clouds you. And at a glance, all of this has to be. All of it has to be the genuine deal.
TALIESIN: All wood is yours.
TRAVIS: It's like looking in a mirror. I see myself at 22, 222. (high-pitched) 301. This is beautiful.
MARISHA: Oh, you just shaved off 21 years. It was an odd jump, for sure.
TALIESIN: Sanded it off, one would say. Oh, I'm-- Yeah.
ASHLEY: TALO Collection. So, what was the inspo for the Oblivion Collection?
TALIESIN: Cheers.
TRAVIS: Well. Things on the outside are not always what they appear on the inside.
MATT: (frantic scribbling)
TRAVIS: After all, beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. But surely you're not interested in hearing everything.
MATT: "Go on!"
MARISHA: No, this is-- We want to-- This feels like the most we've learned about you in the entire six months we've been together.
TALIESIN: I'm strangely into this. Keep going.
TRAVIS: No. Well, some were commissioned pieces and others were just moments of inspiration. The little things that we come across that have beauty in them and how they can be transformed. I love that it found its way to you and that you care for it so deeply. That's all an artist ever really wants.
MATT: "Just happy to see that you're still making work. You were wasted under Oltgar."
TRAVIS: I was. (laughter)
TRAVIS: You're right! I-I took care of that. Drixlitch is still another thing.
MARISHA: Dick slicks?
TRAVIS: Drixlitch!
ASHLEY: Drixlitch, that was your way back in the day. Was something I can't really--
TRAVIS: Can I just say that you have made this a night to remember?
MATT: "Uh!" (laughter)
MATT: He just-- He's not getting words out.
TRAVIS: I'm going to need--
TALIESIN: In through the nose, out through the mouth.
TRAVIS: -- an evening.
MARISHA: Well, I was going to say, you know--
SAM: What do you mean? Like to stay here?
TRAVIS: I'm going to have to-- Yes. This must be chronicled. It's so rare that you find someone--
LAURA: Chet.
TRAVIS: What?!
LAURA: There are some really important things, I--
TRAVIS: No, I don't think so. I can't go on.
ASHLEY: Well, we do have to sleep tonight, so you could just-- Sleep here? Did you make beds?
TRAVIS: Did I make beds?
ASHLEY: Do you have one of his beds?
TALIESIN: Yes, did you make beds?
ASHLEY: Well, I don't know!
TRAVIS: Do you know me at all? Waylon, did I make beds?
MATT: "Would you like to see the guest quarters?"
ASHLEY: Sure.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MATT: He shows you to an additional chamber off to the side that connects to the museum. And you can see within this room, there are nine beds jammed into a room that is too small to carry them. Everything here is like borderline hoarder, just organized well. They're just pushed into this space. You can see he's like, yeah, "I'm going to have to-- I'm saving up for an expansion. I'm running out of room for--"
TRAVIS: (gasps) You have the dwarf futon cut.
MATT: "Yeah."
TRAVIS: It is anatomically correct for the adult dwarf figure, it is perfect in every way.
ASHLEY: These are all a little small.
TRAVIS: (aggressively) For dwarves!
TALIESIN: Anatomically correct. I'm so sorry. I need that explained to me. Anatomically correct bed?
TRAVIS: Of course.
TALIESIN: What am I looking at? What am I missing?
TRAVIS: If you were a dwarf and you were to lay your body upon it, it would envelop you in love, and a caress that which you've never experienced before.
MARISHA: Wow. That sounds incredible.
SAM: I think we should stay here tonight.
LIAM: Are there beds that can handle the talls?
MATT: "Oh, of course, yeah. (laughs) I have the whole collection."
ASHLEY: Wow.
LIAM: Okay, well. Chet.
ASHLEY: Chet, I am so impressed.
MARISHA: I do, I'm so glad you have--
TRAVIS: Like being in my own funeral. It's incredible. It's amazing.
MARISHA: Yeah, sure. I just-- You paid $800 for that table?
LIAM: What's a dollar?
TRAVIS: What's a dollar?
MARISHA: 800 gold.
TRAVIS: (slaps)
MARISHA: My brain!
TALIESIN: Marquesian coin.
MARISHA: So much. Yes. Yeah.
TALIESIN: Dolárs.
MARISHA: We're in Issylra. But how much did you sell this for originally, Chet?
TRAVIS: Which one?
MARISHA: The table. The mahogany table.
TALIESIN: With the five different types of wood?
MARISHA: Woods inlaid? Do you remember?
TRAVIS: Yes. It was commissioned for higher than it sold.
MARISHA: Oh! Oh.
ASHLEY: Oh!
TRAVIS: Several silver.
MARISHA: Oh!
ASHLEY: Boh-doh (oh no).
LIAM: That's a crime.
MARISHA: No, it's just fascinating. It's just honestly, such an odd commentary on the trade, the artistic nature. And in so many things that get passed through hands and accrue in value, but it never really falls back on the artist.
LIAM: Yeah, sometimes artists aren't appreciated in their lifetime.
MARISHA: I know.
LIAM: It's such a blessing that you're still alive for this.
ROBBIE: Commercial success doesn't always equate to artistic mastery.
MARISHA: No, it's true.
TALIESIN: I'll say. You talk about an artist actually seeing someone appreciate their work. Most of the artists I know also want to eat a meal.
MARISHA: Mm-hmm.
TRAVIS: Yes, yes.
TALIESIN: A silver?
MARISHA: Do you feel like you would feel more valued if some of this, like the money had trickled back down to you or do you just feel satisfied in your soul?
TRAVIS: I create because I am. Money is fucking important, but it's not why I did it. And I'll do it until I no longer draw breath. I'm working on new pieces right now.
MATT: "(excited gasp)"
TRAVIS: You could call them My Legendary Beast Theories of Zozos.
SAM: I'm sorry.
TALIESIN: A what?
MATT: "Spell that for me, please."
TALIESIN: How do you spell that?
TRAVIS: Legendary pièce de résistance.
MATT: "Oh."
TALIESIN: Oh!
MATT: "Okay, okay." (laughter)
ASHLEY: Pièce de résistance.
MATT: "I--" (laughter)
TRAVIS: It's elemental.
MATT: "I don't know if this is the right time to bring it up, but me and some of the other C-Poppers have been organizing one of these regional events. If you're available maybe around six or seven weeks from now, would you be a guest at POP-Con? (laughter)
TALIESIN: Someone's going to have one of your pieces glued to their hand.
ROBBIE: You mentioned, right? Before the end of the world?
MATT: "No, no. Weeks from now. Weeks from now." (laughter)
MARISHA: After the end of the world.
TRAVIS: That is a positive outlook.
MATT: "To be fair, we did schedule it before all of this happened."
ROBBIE: Okay.
TRAVIS: And you don't get deposits back.
MATT: "Kind of right before. It was very disconcerting."
ASHLEY: That's a positive outlook.
TRAVIS: Yeah.
ROBBIE: But Chetney--
ASHLEY: You should keep to it.
ROBBIE: -- if we do save the world, we also save this place.
MARISHA: And we save POP-Con.
LIAM: Finally, something--
ASHLEY: Get him to the POP-Con.
TRAVIS: I've never known motivation like this. (laughter)
TRAVIS: Waylon, POP-Con will survive, as will we!
TALIESIN: You're going to roll a d100 in the next 20 minutes.
TRAVIS: Not only will I be there, so will they!
MATT: "I-I believe."
MARISHA: Why do we need to be there?
TRAVIS: Just the fucking guest of honor, you know?
MARISHA: Oh. No one will come to our signing tables. (laughter)
MARISHA: They'll only come to yours.
TRAVIS: I'll teach you how to make stuff. You can figure it out.
MARISHA: Okay.
MATT: "I will make your beds. I know a chef. We can make the finest of food. The food for a king. And you will be my guests of honor for the night and for all the struggles you have ahead of you. I could not see the fate of Exandria in better hands than those behind this great artist."
TALIESIN: I'm sure you have more of an imagination.
LIAM: He will--
TALIESIN: No.
LIAM: He will carve our future.
MATT: "Yes."
ASHLEY: Yes, he will.
MATT: "I think he will."
MARISHA: You know, you mentioned.
ASHLEY: Yeah. Don't you do it again.
MATT: Yeah yeah, yeah.
LAURA: Oh-- (laughter)
MATT: Yeah.
LIAM: I don't think that's ever happened in the history of this show.
TALIESIN: Losing it.
MARISHA: You mentioned wanting to get a painty and we happen to have a very talented, but messy and chaotic painter.
SAM: I could paint you two together, but I-- I would love a signed Pop. (laughter)
TALIESIN: This is getting too weird. Oh no. Oh no!
ASHLEY: Stupid.
ROBBIE: (screams)
ASHLEY: What's happening?
ROBBIE: I need to leave.
TRAVIS: A signed Pop?
SAM: A signed Pop.
TRAVIS: Braius--
TALIESIN: Aah!
TRAVIS: -- because you've shown appreciation of my art 100 percent.
SAM: And please, don't make it out to me.
TALIESIN: Oh! (laughter)
SAM: Just sign it.
TRAVIS: Okay.
SAM: Just sign it.
TRAVIS: Sure.
SAM: Because I don't know what my--
TRAVIS: Did you want me to doodle anything on it?
SAM: I might put it on D&Dbay.
TRAVIS: Okay. (laughter)
MATT: And we're going to end it there for the night. (laughter)
MATT: Because that is a button if ever there was one.
ROBBIE: Oh god. (laughter)
TALIESIN: It kept circling. (laughter)
MATT: We had to pull out. I had to pull out. It was getting too deep.
TALIESIN: Oh god! I was getting a nosebleed.
LIAM: What is reality?
TRAVIS: Oh my god.
TRAVIS and MARISHA: Oh my god.
TALIESIN: Damn it, Sam. Oh.
TRAVIS: You too can try to kill Santa and have all this. (laughter)
ASHLEY: No, let's keep talking to him.
TALIESIN: There's just no fighting it.
MATT: We'll come back to that next time.
ASHLEY: What a great--
TALIESIN: Oh my god!
TRAVIS: If we stay the night here, what if I die in my sleep?
MARISHA: It would be the best!
ASHLEY: What a great way to go!
TALIESIN: I'm sure he already bought a coffin.
MATT: If there was ever a moment!
ROBBIE: Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'd be under glass.
TALIESIN: It's going to happen!
LIAM: You'll become the centerpiece of the museum! (laughter)
TALIESIN: We will "Weekend at Bernie's" you all the way to the fucking moon.
LAURA: You better be careful. He has the Platinum Dragon on his side.
TRAVIS: No, no, it's the wrong dice.
MARISHA: They were.
TALIESIN: You roll next time.
TRAVIS: That was the wrong dice. That didn't count. We got one more chance.
MATT: Okay, okay.
MARISHA: Oh my god!
MATT: Well, thank you all so much for joining us. We love you very much, and is it Thursday yet? Good night.
Cooldown
ASHLEY: Oh, man.
LAURA: Wow, what a fantastically chaotic game!
LIAM: Let's keep talking about it!
ASHLEY: So fun!
LAURA: I love him!
ASHLEY: I love him too!
TRAVIS: Can I get a signed Pop, but don't put my name on it! (laughter)
TALIESIN: Oh my god!
ASHLEY: I might want to sell it later.
TRAVIS: Fucking called out.
TALIESIN: I won't be able to sleep tonight.
MATT: Every single poor Critter who's ever been in line at any of our appearances and has had to wait behind those Pop resellers.
TRAVIS: Yes. Oh my god.
MATT: We're sorry.
TALIESIN: No, we really are.
MATT: And this is our vengeance.
TRAVIS: Holy shit. That was more than I-- he ever deserved.
ROBBIE: God love the real fan.
TRAVIS: I was terrified I had a kid out there or something. I thought this was a Scanlan/Kaylie--
MARISHA: Yes! That's where I thought it was going!
LAURA: I thought it was going to be, "Daddy?"
MATT: That was intended.
TRAVIS: Oh, my god. I went through my backstory and pulled up all the names of my old flames.
LAURA: Wait, didn't we see this same Scalebearer the last time we were here?
ASHLEY: My old flings?
TRAVIS: Martatisch[spelling?], Deanna, Frudell...
MATT: Technically you've seen this Scalebearer in other campaigns but you definitely see him in Season Two of Legend of Vox Machina.
LIAM: This is him in a whole new light. Pompadour! Pompadour!
TRAVIS: Oh, shit! That's right!
LAURA: I knew I recognized that.
MATT: This is Parvesh's character.
SAM: Parvesh. Parvesh Cheena.
LAURA: Oh my god, that's amazing.
TRAVIS: I never saw him be "Woo!"
TALIESIN: All right, we're now less likely to be murdered in our sleep.
MARISHA: Wait, it's him?
LAURA: That's him. I like how you described it and I got such a strong visual of him--
ASHLEY: Yeah, I feel like I did too!
LAURA: I'm like, why do I know him? Funny.
MARISHA: Oh my god.
TRAVIS: Fucking hell, that was so funny.
TALIESIN: As I was holding the hand, the finger came off, and I didn't really know what to do.
MATT: That's why you just screamed.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
LIAM: That guy was not super-impressed by Vox Machina, but Pock O'Pea shows up....
TRAVIS: Yeah.
LAURA: Damn.
TRAVIS: Matching the words was fucked up.
ASHLEY: That was the greatest.
LAURA: Precious.
TALIESIN: You were on fire, by the way. You were on absolute fire.
LAURA: There were so many things.
SAM: There were so many great things. The Bright Queen was amazing.
TALIESIN: She was such a fucker.
LAURA: She's so funny.
LIAM: He'd probably have a much bigger place to live if all his budget wasn't going towards the Pop.
LAURA: Oh, my gosh.
MATT: Oh yeah.
TRAVIS: Your responses as the Bright Queen, though, the chambered responses, were fucking nuts.
LAURA: Your comebacks are like (snaps fingers).
TRAVIS: Too fast!
LAURA: She's had thousands of years to develop her wit.
MATT: You live in these heads for a while and you have to step back into that space and see where it goes.
TALIESIN: I love her.
MATT: Sometimes, it doesn't work out. Sometimes, it's fire, so--
ROBBIE: You were dialed in tonight. Oh my god, bro.
LAURA: And what's crazy is you had that many different women that you were speaking as and every single one of them was clearly defined. When you spoke, we knew who it was.
MATT: That makes me happy to hear, because that was my biggest fear. I was like, "Shit, I have Allura and Vex'ahlia next to each other."
LAURA: And Vex, which is a hard switch.
ASHLEY: I knew exactly who was talking.
LAURA: It was perfect.
TALIESIN: I really was enjoying the Vex. I thought he was nailing it.
LAURA: I thought Vex was great.
SAM: Did the Bright Queen--
MATT: I was trying to give that balance of herself but also still stately and experienced in these political spaces.
LAURA: Yeah.
SAM: --is she asking for Ashton's head, basically?
TALIESIN: They want to dissect me.
LAURA: Yeah, they want to dissect you.
TRAVIS: I think any way that Ashton can find their way into the Dynasty after all this...
TALIESIN: And you didn't tell me.
SAM: Dead or alive.
MATT: Whatever way it takes.
SAM: Oh shit.
MATT: I don't think she's insinuating, "Kill him," but "If he dies on his way--"
SAM: That's how Chetney will probably interpret it.
LAURA: Get him back.
MATT: "--bring the head back. Bring him back." It's very much like, "Y'all are going to the moon to do some dangerous shit."
TALIESIN: I'm okay with that.
MATT: "If he comes back, bring them by. If he doesn't make it, bring him by."
MARISHA: It's good to donate your body to science.
TALIESIN: In theory, I don't actually know how this thing works at all. God only knows who the fuck-- There might just be 50 me's in there. I don't know. Maybe you just reset it like a fucking computer.
LAURA: That would be amazing.
TRAVIS: I'm sure she would love to replicate the experiement.
TALIESIN: You just roll back the 95 update.
LIAM: We got a lot coming at us.
TRAVIS: We have a silver ancient dragon named Athudashionus--
TALIESIN: Good name.
ASHLEY: Athadashery.
MATT: Athudashionus.
MARISHA: That might be the most syllables...
TALIESIN: That's my favorite name.
MATT: Oh, dragons need syllables. You know, like, "I am the great golden watcher over this glade! For thousands of years I have looked upon these people. I weave the magics of the realm and have protected you since the inception of your spirits. I am... Adon. I am... James."
LAURA: My name's Bob!
ROBBIE: Kyle.
MATT: Those names are great! But a dragon likes to add seven or eight syllables.
TRAVIS: Yeah, man.
MATT: That was fucking crazy.
TALIESIN: What a fucking romp.
ROBBIE: That was wild.
TALIESIN: All the speeches were pretty fucking great!
MATT: Y'all did great!
MARISHA: All the speeches were good.
TRAVIS: Equine dragon! Come on, man!
MARISHA: You were basically forced into two improv monologues.
LAURA: I love it, though, that you did the whole thing and you were like, "Great deflection. What do you bring?" That was such a good call out.
TALIESIN: I was so proud.
MARISHA: Oh, yeah!
ROBBIE: You said we were in these characters' heads, so that sounded like the apt reply to me.
MATT: Of course.
LAURA: Oh, 100%
MATT: That made complete sense.
MARISHA: And you finally got to meet yourself, with Cerkonos!
ROBBIE: That's right! Isn't that weird?
MATT: He's the one who called you out.
ROBBIE: I know. Yeah.
MARISHA: It's the Spider-Man meme.
MATT: Kind of, yeah.
TALIESIN: It was amazing. Everybody's speech was so-- Everybody brought such an interesting-- and it never felt out of character. I was really enjoying watching everybody do their--
MATT: Even Ashton step up into that space?
LAURA: God, yes.
ASHLEY: Yeah, that was amazing.
MATT: That was awesome.
TALIESIN: I was like, "How do I do this without ruining everything?"
LAURA: Without getting everybody angry with you in this room?
TALIESIN: It only took 100 fucking episodes, but I think I get what punk philosophy looks like in a world where there's different things to be angry about.
MATT: Right. You definitely won the "angry" vote in that room.
TALIESIN: Yeah.
MARISHA: Oh boy.
TALIESIN: There was also no where else to go.
MARISHA: Kicking it off with, "Are we really going to start debating about ancient enemies now?" That's a great way to be like-- to start it off.
ROBBIE: I'm just glad we didn't have to debate about a plan of action.
LAURA: I know. I was afraid that we were going to have to present it.
ROBBIE: Yeah. It was really nice.
TALIESIN: Defend your thesis.
MATT: If it went very poorly, like if the rolls went very poorly, then it would have been like other people start stepping up to it, and been possibly forced to work with individuals that may or may not gel with your vibe. I had some different paths it could have gone.
TALIESIN: Who is the Darrington Brigade and why have we been pinned up with them? Shit!
ROBBIE: I don't know. I've been here for a hot minute. That just felt so cohesive. At least since my time back, I feel like we needed a moment that brought us together. Because we've been fractured for so long, and it feels like--
LAURA: It felt like a team.
LIAM: We've kept getting kicked in the teeth for moment after moment.
TRAVIS: (singing) Wood brings us to where we--
MATT: By the way, you talking with Zeru, your dad? (appreciative sounds from the cast)
TALIESIN: I was tearing up over here.
MATT: That was intense.
TRAVIS: Why the pause?
ROBBIE: That's real stuff, though, man.
TALIESIN: That was heavy. It was great.
ROBBIE: Parent stuff's tough.
TALIESIN: My favorite bit of D&D is parent stuff.
ROBBIE: Yeah, for sure. Even good parents. There's nothing wrong with my folks in my backstory. When I sent it in, I'm like, "They're not bad people." It's just different dynamics lead you down different paths in life.
TALIESIN: I think all of my good parents I just murder. They're good parents. Even then, they were kind of--
MATT: Writing the backstory, they were already dead, you mean.
TALIESIN: Well, that, and also we weren't big huggers in Whitestone. We were not an affectionate--
TRAVIS: No, what do you mean?
LIAM: Cad's family was great.
TRAVIS: Cassandra and Percy, totally huggers.
TALIESIN: I'm definitely passing that trauma on to my children. It's great.
MATT: It's DeRolo tradition.
TALIESIN: I have a daughter I'm turning into a monster. I'm so excited.
MATT: It's like "Midsommar." At a certain point you just take them out.
TALIESIN: She's going to be the next big villain.
TRAVIS: And Braius has been with us for 48 hours.
SAM: Two and a half days.
MATT: What a fucking--
ROBBIE: Blood in, blood out, baby!
TRAVIS: You're fucking strapped with Dawnfather armor. Or Platinum Dragon armor.
MARISHA: Are you going to go for it? Are you going to go all in?
SAM: All in? What do you mean?
MARISHA: On the Platinum Dragon?
SAM: Well, this is an interesting opportunity for redemption.
LAURA: Yeah.
TALIESIN: Are you going to break up with your old god? Or are you just going to ghost them?
SAM: I mean... they're already ghosty.
TALIESIN and LAURA: Yeah.
MATT: I mean, this is a lot of interesting paths for you to-- to ride it out.
ROBBIE: I love that you're such a good liar.
SAM: I know. It's the best.
ROBBIE: It's so fucking-- because we don't know--
LAURA: No, we don't know what you're doing.
ROBBIE: It's great not knowing.
TALIESIN: He's so charming.
TRAVIS: Your Persuasion is +12 but your Deception is higher?
LAURA: No, they're the same.
SAM: No, they're both +14.
LIAM: So it's whatever you want. Don't you think you might be leading the Platinum Dragon on?
LAURA: I've got a +15 to Persuasion.
SAM: I have two missions.
MATT: Yup.
TALIESIN: If you like it, you should put some plate mail on it, is all I'm saying.
LAURA: That's why I always say I can talk to people, but I trip over my words. Just because I've got good Persuasion doesn't mean I don't fucking fail on every--
MATT: You guys want to go over what you got?
SAM: Oh yeah.
ROBBIE: Yeah.
LAURA: Wait, what?
TRAVIS: The items.
LIAM: Their loot.
MATT: Items you guys got.
TALIESIN: Loot call.
SAM: Mine is plus two to AC. It's armor, it's armor. I get an extra 30 hit points of Lay on Hands, so now I can Lay on Hands up to 85 hit points.
ALL: Whoa!
MARISHA: That's clutch.
TRAVIS: Especially for a group without a healer.
SAM: And when a creature attacks a target within five feet of me, so if you're standing next to me, I can use my reaction to impose disadvantage on their attack.
TRAVIS: Damn. Get in there.
MATT: It is an armor of a protector.
SAM: Yeah. Truthbearer.
MATT: It's great, too, because the majority of that sheet is the history--
SAM: The story.
MATT: --of the saintly hero that you are wearing his armor, representing Asmodeus.
SAM: Uh huh.
LAURA: Wow.
LIAM: Does it itch on the inside?
MATT: Oh, it does, a little bit.
TRAVIS: Tell us about that Remy LeBeau blade.
ROBBIE: Oh, the Gambolcleft? The Vortex Blade? I mean, this is probably the perfect weapon for my build. I've been so scared to do combat since I'm back. I have not swung a single sword since I've been back.
MATT: I know.
ROBBIE: I know you know.
MARISHA: It's time.
ROBBIE: You know what this is? This is six hours of action economy homework, because this is so complicated. But I love it.
TALIESIN: Bring it. Bring it.
ROBBIE: Plus three--
LIAM and TALIESIN: Whoa.
ROBBIE: --to attack--
MARISHA: That's crazy.
ROBBIE: --and damage rolls, so I'm-- and I'm proficient in it, because College, so I'm up to +12 on it, so whenever I manage to roll an 18 or higher I get a bardic inspiration back. And then every time I deal damage with my Blade Flourish feature, which is another something I've been avoiding, I deal double the extra damage from that feature. And then, it's possessed by a wind spirit, so if I hit something with it, I can move 15 feet instantly and make an additional attack, no action required, at disadvantage, but this additional attack can also trigger this feature. So I just became--
TALIESIN: You just turn into a fucking dervish!
ROBBIE: So if I keep hitting I become like a--
MATT: Yeah, for one round.
ASHLEY: Yeah, whirling dervish.
ROBBIE: For one round, and then it's gone.
MATT: And then it's gone until a rest.
TALIESIN: I love a whirling dervish.
ROBBIE: It's like a glass cannon.
LIAM: So it chain reactions.
ROBBIE: But if I luck out and I keep hitting, then I'm just bipping around--
MATT: You just do attack after attack after attack in one major round.
MARISHA: That's great for minions.
ROBBIE: And I have free double attack, too. So I assume if that's within the round, I could initiate another attack and...
MATT: Yeah, you could attack twice, and if either of those hit, you can then--
TRAVIS: Either of them.
MATT: --roll another attack with disadvantage for each. If both of those hit, then you get to roll another attack with disadvantage. You just keep going until they fail.
ASHLEY: Oh, my god.
ROBBIE: And it's just whenever I hit? So I guess the Blade Flourish would count as well? I'll have to work it out. We got to talk about it.
MATT: Yeah, I'll talk to you about it.
ROBBIE: I need your help.
MATT: Yeah, I got you. I got you.
TRAVIS: Slice and dice, baby!
MATT: It's more or less like you got one-- there's one burst ability you can use for one round and that's how it all helps out. It just becomes rolling until you stop hitting, and then it's done.
ROBBIE: It's a crazy glass cannon. I love it.
MARISHA: "It's done"-- what do you mean? You can only use it once/
ROBBIE: I can only use that feature where I bip around--
LAURA: One time.
ROBBIE: One time per long rest.
MARISHA: Until you finish a short rest.
TALIESIN: Is it long rest or short rest?
MARISHA: No, no, short rest.
ROBBIE: Short rest? Okay.
MARISHA: That's great.
MATT: But also, you could also use it and miss twice and it does nothing. Or hit, miss, but then that one hit attacks, roll with disadvantage, and then-- it's very swingy and sometimes it won't do much. Sometimes, if you're lucky, it'll do a lot for one round. It's basically encouraging, if you want to, to occasionally have-- because bard spells are really powerful, and I find that some of the later level bards, there's a lot of pressure to be like-- some of these spells are really big and very helpful, so I'm not going to get into battle and combat. But you specifically picked a bard college that benefits being in combat, so I wanted there to be a family-given sword that had both narrative purpose but also encouraged you and gave you benefits to feel like you had more of a balanced choice between getting in the fray if you wanted to. Plus, you and Orym in a fray together with both of your crazy dance combat--
LAURA: Oh my god, it would be amazing.
MATT: There's also some cool options there.
LAURA: You could dance around each other.
TALIESIN: I was also going to say, when I hit Teleport, too--
LAURA: How beautiful would it be?
SAM: Have sex.
TALIESIN: --there's just a whole bunch of people who can move.
LAURA: Have sex while you're fighting.
MATT: Jesus Christ.
TALIESIN: It's getting to the point where we just have people who can move across the board at that speed.
LIAM: If he hits, he can just keep hitting it again and again and again--
TALIESIN: We can also keep setting up advantage and setting up advantage and setting up advantage.
ROBBIE: Yeah.
MARISHA: Because that's your action, so you could throw out a concentration spell or even like a bonus action spell and then do that.
ROBBIE: Yeah, or just keep using the actions for a second attack and hope it hits on the second one. We'll talk about it.
MATT: Yeah.
ROBBIE: As soon as I read this, I'm like--
MARISHA: Flowcharts are great.
ROBBIE: --I know why you gave this to me.
MATT: Yeah.
MARISHA: Sometimes we'll make little flowcharts and they're good.
LAURA: Yeah, they help.
ROBBIE: That's sick, I'm ready to scrap. I'm so excited about this. It's such a motivator to get in the mix. That's really cool.
MATT: Hell yeah.
TRAVIS: I'm ready to scrap.
MARISHA: Ready to scrap!
TALIESIN: Aimee Carrero's magical flow charts.
TRAVIS: I can't wait to get into it.
LIAM: Let's go to the fray!
MATT: All right. See you guys next time.
TRAVIS: Great job, Matt!
MATT: Great job, you all! Man, you're killing it!